Troubled: A Demi Lovato FanFic

Makeup

After a couple minutes of me sobbing I raised my head off of Demi and let go.

"Thank you."

"You don't have to thank me. I love you baby girl."

"I'm so sorry..."

"Sorry? For what?"

"I've acted like a brat." I turned my head, feeling my cheeks get hot just thinking about how mean I'd been before.

"It's fine Cece. I know that's not you."

"It might be me. I don't know who I am."

"You're Cecelia De La Garza. You have a big heart and you love little kids. You're appreciate and smart, and really cool. You're beautiful inside and out."

"If I was really all of those things I would have never been mean to you. I would have never tricked my school. I got arrested! I'm just a big fat failure!" I turned my head again, feeling awkward to be saying things out loud.

"Nevermind. Don't listen to me. I don't even know what I'm saying anymore."

"You're saying what your heart things. You need to get these things off your chest. It's the only way to recover."

Demi turned me around.

"Look at me."

"No I can't." I felt my cheeks burning.

"Look at me right now."

I reluctantly tilted my head up.

"You're beautiful and worth recovery. I'm going to get you there."

"Okay." What more could I say?

"We have a lot to figure out now. Let's eat dinner first. I'll get the pizza ready. Go wash up and we'll eat."

My stomach churned at the thought of food.

I stumbled to the bathroom.

Demi's going to make me tell somebody about the incident with Tyler's brother.

Demi's going to tell mom and dad about the school situation.

Demi's going to make me eat.

Demi's going to make me think about things I don't want to think about.

Especially not if I can't cope with cutting or drinking or anything else.

Why can't I just forget about the past?

I don't want to cut anymore or go back to my old bad habits. But how can I live without it?

The thoughts swirling in my mind made me vomit. Not on purpose.

My head ached for a painkiller. Or a cigarette or anything. I felt like I had been hit by a truck.

I stumbled down the stairs to Demi.

"Demi. I don't feel good." My eyes teared. Why am I being such a baby?

She felt my forehead.

"You don't feel like you have fever. What hurts?"

"E-e-everything." I shivered.

"Come sit down. Can you eat?"

"N-n-no. I might throw up."

"I'll heat you some soup."

She guided me to the couch and wrapped me in a blanket.

When the soup was done she hand fed me. I was too tired to fight back.

She climbed onto the couch and lay me in her lap.

My eyes tried to close but I fought the sleep.

She stroke my cheek and hushed me.

I felt so vulnerable and little. This was new. Is this what a mom is?

When I awoke again it appeared to be morning. I was initially alarmed by the warmth surrounding me, but when I realized it was Demi I felt better.

I stretched off the couch and cracked my back. Remind me to never sleep on a couch again.

Overall I felt better. I felt more rested than I had in a long time. I went into my room to get ready for the day. I felt like a new person. Is this recovery?

I looked through my drawers at my clothes.

Nothing looked right...

It was all black or red or dark. It was all baggy.

I wanted to look... cute.

I gazed into the mirror at my ratty hair. Maybe I should brush it?

My pale skin made me look ill.

"Goodmorning beautiful." Demi appeared in my doorway, yawning.

"Goodmorning sleeping beauty."

"If I'm sleeping beauty you can be cinderella. I'll call you Cindy."

"Really Demi?"

"Yep Cindy. So whatcha doing?"

"Trying to get dressed."

"Ooh let me pick out an outfit."

"Good luck with that."

She went through my drawers frowning.

"Let's go get something from my closet."

"Um okay."

"Let's go!" She pulled me into her room and came out of her closet with a black skirt and a flower print shirt.

"This is from when I was like 13. I've been saving it for the twins but it would look great on you. Try it on!"

Once in the outfit I looked in the mirror.

I twirled. I looked... good? Maybe?

"Cece... you look beautiful! Can I do your hair?"

"Sure..."

She ran a brush through it and parted it on the side. She added a silver headband.

"Demi?"

"Yes sweetie?"

"I think I should wear makeup."

"You're beautiful already though."

"But my face is so pale. And I look just... weird."

"I'll put a tiny bit of blush on you." She frowned. "But baby when you start eating you'll look more alive. I can see it in your eyes already."

"Really?" I smiled. I felt... pretty. This is the look for me.

"Really. Now let me get ready because we need to go meet with mom and dad."