Endlessly...

Chapter 21 - Abby

To: Abby Ricci

From: Olivia Riviera

Subject: (No Subject)

Abby,

I don't know what to say...

I don't know what to say to make things better for you and for me. I swore I would never do anything to make you cry because I could never bear it. But I did anyway. But I also swore to myself I would never sacrifice who I am and what I believe in for someone else. I am so torn between what I believe in and loving you.

I meant it. With every fiber of my being. I meant it when I said I am in love with you. I love you, Abigail Ricci. I have loved you all my life, it just took time for our worlds to align and for my heart to catch up.

I'm sorry I walked away. I should have stayed. I should have stayed and talked to you. I'm sorry I was the cause of any pain you feel right now.

I love you, munch. I always have and I always will.

Liv

I must have read her email 1000 times since she sent it. I don't blame her for walking away. I do wish she stayed to talk to me and work things out before leaving for New York. I do wish she could understand where I was coming from. She said she loved me five times in that email and my stomach filled with butterflies and I couldn't help but smile because she loves me and I love her. I do. I love her and I mean it. But that doesn't change how scared I am still.

To: Olivia Riviera

From: Abby Ricci

Subject: I know what to say...

Olivia,

I know what to say. But we should do it in person.

I'm sorry too. I'm sorry I'm asking too much of you. I'm sorry you've fallen in love with someone that isn't ready. I'm sorry for hurting you. I never meant to cause you any pain, either. I can't bear the thought of you crying because of me, too. I feel terrible just thinking about it.

Please come see me when you get back in town.

Until then, I miss you, baby.

Munch

I know, I know. Why didn't I say I love you back? Because that's something I want to say to her in person. I want to tell her over and over again until I can't anymore.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

"I don't know what else we're going to do though besides tell each other we love one another..." I say to Kasey.

Kasey and I have been good friends since she joined the show and Monty died we got even closer. We just clicked instantly and she was one of the first people back in LA I told about Abby and me.

"I mean, that's the first step, right? When does she get back?"

"In a few days...I was thinking of being at her house when she gets home with dinner and some flowers...basically a huge apology."

"I think that's a great start, Abz. But that doesn't solve your problem..."

"I know but I won't know what will solve our problem until we talk."

"Would you consider another alternative to having a publicity boyfriend?"

"Like what?"

"Oh, I don't know, just not having one at all? Fuck the press, man! You shouldn't care about what they have to say about your relationship or lack of. You know you're happy and that's all that matters. I'm not siding with Liv but I'm also not siding with you on this one...you two are on your own. I'm here for moral support."