Chapter 54.

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The day of the funeral~

I stare at myself in the mirror as I sit at my vanity, barely recognising the person staring back. My eyes are dark, vacant looking, I feel like a shell of myself, barely a person. Mason has been texting ever since I landed, he called this morning; but I couldn't speak. The words were impossible to get out without breaking down, and I can't afford to do that right now.

My eyes flicker down to the small piece of pink ribbon which hangs from the mirror, I trace it with my finger, closing my eyes as I'm taken back to that day.

~

"It's okay, my darling girl—uncle Steve is helping her." she tells me softly, crouching down beside me in the corner of the room, I'm hiding.

"What's wrong with mommy?" I cry, the screaming and breaking of bottles echoing through the house. She was drinking the bad stuff again.

"She's sick, baby. We're going to help, I promise," Carol smiles, holding out her pinky finger. I wrap mine around it as we kiss our hands, that's our special promise.

I squeeze my eyes shut, covering my ears with my hands at the screaming noises. Why won't it stop?

"Look," Carol whispers, making me open my eyes. "This is a very special ribbon, and it keeps me safe," she smiles, taking a pink shiny ribbon from her hair. "And now it's going to keep you safe." she ties it into mine tightly.

"Really?" I ask, poking the bow in my hair.

"It's a magic ribbon, my darling girl, as long as you wear it—mommy can't come in here." she kisses my cheek, reaching out her hand. I feel better now, I have my magic ribbon. Aunt Carol always makes me feel safe.

"Ready to go to sleep now?" she asks, leading me into my bed.

"Can you stay?" I ask, "The ribbon can keep you safe, too."

"Of course," she gives me a happy smile, tucking me in and laying beside me.

"Aunt Carol, I'm still scared." I begin to cry again. I don't like when mommy drinks that stuff, she gets scary when she does that. She yells and she breaks things, she yells at me.

"I'm right here, baby. Nothing will ever happen to you when I'm here," she rubs the back of my hand.

"You won't leave, right?" I sniffle.

"I'm right here, Amara—I'll always be right here." she tells me softly. I feel safe now.

"Sleep now, my darling girl—everything will be alright in the morning." she whispers, stroking my hair until my eyes become heavy. "I love you, Amara." she says softly—and I drift to sleep, knowing she's right there, she'll always be right there.

I'm safe now.

~

"Mar, it's time." my mom's voice breaks me out of my daze, it was so vivid—I was right back there, with her.

"Okay," I croak.

I open my eyes, the tears cascading down.

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