one of the boys » david dobrik au

seventeen

Though technically there was nothing awkward or weird between David and I after Halloween, I was convinced it was the reason for my downward spiral.

I failed an assignment I tried way too hard on, which made me extremely upset (for no reason... I still had an A in the class). I then took a bath to relieve my stress and cut myself while shaving (also not a big deal, but it made me even more upset). My mom, Karmen, called and told me that her brother had kicked out my cousin for coming out as gay and he was now living in my moms' guest room for the time being. Then, I was trying to make a pasta recipe I found on TikTok and burnt the garlic before I even started.

That's how I ended up on the kitchen floor alone and crying, positive that my act of sluttiness when I knew it was a bad idea was the cause of all my problems. I didn't care what he thought—at least that's what I tried to convince myself—but Brandon would be so disappointed in me if he knew. It was a stupid thing to worry about, but my stupid brain was stupidly brainwashed into thinking it was true.

"Are you okay?" David tentatively asked from the doorway of the kitchen. He was the only one home. Jeff went to the gym without me after he walked in on me getting naked for my bath (without knocking), and Zane was out eating with Erin. I looked up at him, tears streaming down my face, and he immediately frowned and came to join me on the floor. "What's wrong, Cam?"

"I burnt the garlic."

"That's it?" he chuckled, but when I didn't match his energy, his face returned to its former serious and pitying expression. "I'm sorry. That's not a big deal, though, right? You can just chop more."

"I can't do anything by myself," I slammed my head back against the cabinets we were leaned against a few times for emphasis, which freaked David out. He had probably never seen a person have a full fledged breakdown over something so simple. "I hate being an adult."

"Don't fucking do that. You're going to crack your head open," he placed a hand behind my head as a barrier so I couldn't try it again. "Listen, I know you're probably upset about more than just the garlic, but the garlic is a quick fix. Do you want me to help you?"

"Help me cook?" I asked, and he nodded. "Why would you do that?"

"Because we're friends," he shrugged like it was obvious. "And friends don't let friends cry over burnt garlic. And you clearly need to eat the pasta."

"I'm trying to make Gigi Hadid's pasta recipe," I told him, then started laughing at how stupid it was that burnt garlic was the thing that broke me after my long day. "Didn't go too well."

"I think you need to put the onion in a little before the garlic," he told me as he stood to assess the damage on the stove. "Or cut the onion way smaller or the garlic way bigger."

"I'm so fucking stupid," I almost started in on another wave of tears, but at that point, I was sort of numb to the pain of being an idiot. "That makes way more sense."

"You aren't stupid, Millie," he held out his hand to help me up. "You're very capable of making pasta. I think Gigi must've gave you bad directions."

"She would never."

"I'm trying to make you feel better," he said.

"I know."

"I'll cut the onion and you cut the garlic," he instructed me.

"It's a shallot."

"Okay, Bobby Flay, I'll cut the damn shallot. Do you want to talk about why you were crying?" he asked, not seeming the least bit nervous about getting into the details.

"It's just been a long day," I explained. "Everything went wrong. And when my cousin Alejandro came out to my uncle today, he kicked him out. My uncle doesn't even accept my mom yet, and she came out when she was twelve, I think. It just made me sad because he was my first friend when I got adopted. He was the first person that made me feel like I was in an actual family, you know? And now he's upset, and that makes me upset."

"How old is he?" David asked.

"Fifteen, I think. I'm 19? Yeah, he's fifteen," I nodded to myself as I continued chopping garlic into teeny tiny pieces. "And he's such a sweet and quiet kid, like he just doesn't deserve to feel ostracized by his own family, you know?"

"What about his mom? Is she in agreement with his dad?"

"Uh... to be honest, I don't really know where the mom is. By the time I got adopted, she wasn't around anymore. But they're a very traditional, conservative Mexican family so I doubt she'd support him anyway."

"Does your grandma support your mom?" he seemed genuinely curious about the answer and the whole topic in general.

"My grandma on that side of the family doesn't. They all kind of just tolerate Karmen when they need something and for Christmas," I told him with a frown, watching as he first dropped the shallot into the pan and started cooking it a little. "My family on Angie's side is super sweet, but they live in Vermont so I only ever see them for Christmas."

"I'm sorry about your cousin," David told me, sticking out his hand for the plate I cut the garlic on so he could add it into the mix. "It's probably better that he's with your moms anyway."

"I know. I would just hate to be rejected by my own family."

"Do you ever feel sad that you got put up for adoption? Or that it took a while for you to get adopted?" David asked, not too worried about the fact that I almost cracked my head open earlier due to frustration. I think he thought that I was better now that he was here. I kind of was.

"Not really," I shrugged. "I mean, it sucks that I was in foster care until I was seven, but I barely remember most of it. And I don't know who my biological parents are, but everyone is pretty sure they were methheads. They left me in a shoebox at the front door of a church, so... it's probably better that they didn't keep me. I don't feel rejected or anything. It wasn't me that they didn't want, you know? It was just a baby."

"I get that," he nodded to himself. "What does Gigi do next?"

David helped me cook my pasta and then ate half of it and forced me to watch Iron Man while doing it. I fell asleep halfway into the movie and woke up to him carrying me to my bed. He smoothed some hair out of my face after he laid me down and said, "Goodnight, princess."

I went right back to sleep.

I cannot handle the princess i really cannot
Xoxo abby