I Will Survive

28

It's been almost 2 weeks, Regina is able to function and move able now without feeling weak. By the end of the day, she feels tired and sleeps early. Today Regina finally had the strength and courage to face Emma again. She was stood outside the blondes building, getting enough strength to push the button. Regina took a deep breath. She finally pushed Emma's buttoned and waited, hoping someone answered.

"Hey, who's this" Katya asked, using the wall to hold herself up.

"Can I talk to Emma please" Regina asked in a nervously voice, worried she will get a no.

"Sure, who is it though"

"Regina"

Katya left the button, leaving Regina stood alone. She was growing nervous, her anxiety kicking in. Emma got to the door phone but hesitated, not sure she is ready to talk to Regina. The blonde sighed dramatically, pushing the button to get the brunettes attention.

"What" Emma asked, exhausted from her last of sleep and the whole situation.

"Hey... Can we talk... Please, Em" Regina awkwardly asked, scared at how it would hurt to get a no.

"Fine, come up" Emma sighed her response, sounding very reluctant to allowing this.

Regina sighed in relief, waiting for the door to open. As it did, Regina quickly made her way in and straight up the stairs. She walked down the hall and found number 12, knocking on the door. Katya pulled it open and grabbed her bag, walking out the apartment.

"Kicking me out my own place, how rude" Katya said to the blonde in the doorway, laughing while walking away.

"Ignore her, come in" Emma tiredly sighed, walking back towards the lounge. Regina stepped in with a nervous look, closing the door behind her. She walked over to the sofa and sat beside the blonde, not knowing what to say. "You don't look weak today"

"My strength is almost back, I'm only really tired in the evening" Regina replied with a slight smile, glancing across to the woman. It then fell silent. Neither knew what to do or say in the moment. Regina looked at the woman beside her, reacting out to hold her hand. "I miss you so much, I'm so sorry"

"I know" Emma simply said, keeping her eyes on her lap at all times. Regina softly sighed in exhaustion, knowing it was a long shot. Emma linked their hands again and looked at the brunette, catching her attention again. "I missed you too... Now get on with what you wanted to say"

"I know Rex told you about my grandmother and how she made me feel. I never wanted to push you away... I love you too much but the proposal and me dying, it all just became too much. I push everyone away, that's how I've always survived. That's why Rex is the only person left, I pushed what little friends and family I ever had away" Regina softly said, both looking into each others eyes with love. "I knew I couldn't hurt you"

"You hurt me because you pushed me away. Regina, you don't get it, do you? I knew what I was getting myself into, I knew there was a big possibility you could die and I chose to stay. I loved you so much, I couldn't care you may die because I just wanted to be married to you. That's what you don't get, anyone in your life knows what they are getting into and chooses to stay" Emma said with a slightly annoyed tone to her voice, looking away to avoid glaring at her.

"I almost died, why would I want to put you through being married and loosing that" Regina asked, this time a annoyed that she was being made to be so bad.

"That was my choice to marry you and I wanted to" Emma huffed, sitting up more with anger.

"It was my choice to accept and I chose not to do that to you, that's why I said no. I love you so much, that's fucking why I said no! You think I haven't heard those silent cries in the bathroom or when you think I'm asleep next to you, it breaks my heart to hear you cry like that" Regina snapped, knowing she is the one who done the right thing.

"You heard me crying" Emma questioned nervously, always trying to hide her breakdowns from the brunette.

"Yes, all the time and Rex told me about you doing drugs a month before we broke up. Look what happened to you, you were already going through too much" Regina replied in a softer tone, holding the blondes shoulder.

"I was handling it"

"Doing drugs doesn't count as handling it"

"Well it worked, you never knew because it was at night and I managed to cope better with all the stress" Emma snapped, standing up from the sofa in annoyance.

"No, it didn't work! You were suppose to be sober for one and you still cried every night! How the fuck does that count as working" Regina angrily asked, doing as the blonde did and standing up.

"I didn't care about being sober, I liked drugs, it was you who wanted me sober" Emma huffed, walking towards her bedroom door.

"No, no, no, that is not true! You told me you wanted to! I said from day one that I accepted you as you, I just didn't really like it but u accepted! Don't turn this around on me" Regina snapped in anger, glaring as she watched the blonde.

"Just get out" Emma said in annoyance, slamming her bedroom door shut. Regina stood in shock, did Emma really just walk away. She stormed to the bedroom door and pushed it open, seeing Emma with a needle of heroine in her hand. "I just said get out"

"What the fuck, Swan" Regina asked in shock, seeing the blonde was ready to inject it.

"Well, what did you think I was doing in here" Emma asked as if the woman asked a stupid question. Regina quickly went over and took the needle before Emma could put it into her. The blonde looked anger, switching between the drug and the brunette holding the drug. "Give it back"

"No"

"Regina, give it back now!"

"No!"

Both were just glaring at each other, waiting for someone to make the first move. Emma ran at the woman, causing Regina to run out the bedroom and towards the window. She quickly threw it out as she ran past. Emma ran to the window and watched as it dropped to the street, shock across her face at that actually being done.

"You threw it?" Emma questioned in shock, angrily looking round at the brunette.

"Of course I did, I'm not letting you inject that shit into you" Regina replied with a glare, knowing it was obvious.

Emma ran at the woman and pinned her against the wall, anger filling through her. Regina just stayed calm, knowing the blonde wouldn't do anything to hurt her. Emma just glared, feeling so angry and hurt by everything.

"Why did you do that? Why do you care" Emma asked with a small crack in her voice, feeling her tears wanting to build up.

"Because I love you" Regina simply replied, knowing she wasn't lying at all.

Emma let go of the woman and turned away, looking at the ground to contain herself. Regina wasn't sure what to do; she stepped off the wall in hope to comfort. In one quick move, Emma repinned Regina against the wall and kissed her. The pair deepened the kiss as they fought for dominance, holding each other as close as they could. Emma lifted Regina from the ground and held her against the wall. They began ripping each others clothes off, one by one until they were naked on Emma's bed.