ThE inFaMoUS LoVe StOrY

CHAPTER-9

Stefan's POV

I didn't meet her after that night,she was not seen in any of the concerts and was also not placed in the same hotel as mine. I have dated numerous girls in my life never really loved any one except my last ex who I wished to marry. She betrayed me and I completely lost my shit and I could no longer get any hold over myself.I was into a lot of shit-drugs, smoking and alcohol and I'm still not out of it but certainly better. I beacme a person with a lost cause forgetting who he really is and I hated myself to the point that I wanted to isolate myself from the people I love so that they would not get affected due to me.

I had a hard time dealing with the break up and myself post breakup.Due to the excessive amount of nicotine and cocaine circulating in my body,I got sleep deprived.My mind would stay super active during nights which resulted in nothing but pain.This is when I happened to write songs about break up and stuff which became a massive hit. I could no longer endure the pain and sleepless nights, I went to a drug rehab and got myself clean of drugs but I still smoked a lot and drank occassionally.

I am usually a very confident person but there were instances where I considered myself shit and held myself at a very low esteem.At some point,I developed social anxiety,stage fear and isolated myself and it would scare the shit out of me whenever I saw a bunch of people.
I didn't show myself to the media for over a year.I really had a hard time defeating this anxiety,it was worse than ever and then I broke up with my girlfriend which only got added up to my misery.After break up the media was again flashing on me and I was in the news,I just couldn't endure all that....it was too hard to deal with media with my social anxiety.

My mom helped me to get over this anxiety stuff,she took me to counseling where I used to interact with people and it finally got better.I could defeat it.This is the first time I'm doing concerts post break up.I was pretty much scared during the first day when we had our first concert in Chennai but then things ended well and I'm slowly regaining my lost self who would die to perform in concerts.Things began to slowly fall in place and my mom is happy.I got rid of my gf, anxiety and drugs, though I still smoke a lot.I just want to live a normal life making music and doing concerts,I wanna see my mother happy and I just wanna focus on my real self who is a singer and only a singer.I would never ever get so vulnerable due to a girl and lose shit out of myself,I would never fall for someone cause by doing so I'll only ruin myself once again.

Speaking of her,she is different from the rest of the girls I met.I saw thousands of girls throwing themselves at me, doing crazy things in order to get noticed, sending expensive gifts, dressing inappropriatly and what not.Kritika didn't do even a slightest thing to seek my attention,she kept walking away instead.Before that interview,I was really nervous and scared but she kept me entertained through out making me oblivious to the nervousness that I was battling.I freaked out completely at the party looking at the enormous number of girls throwing themselves over me and found a lone place for myself at the bar. After my break up,I developed this mentality of staying away from girls and tried to avoid them amap.I thought I could talk to her and divert myslef for a while at the party but then she left immediately.I barely had any reason to stay there so I came back to hotel room.

I was at the terrace and I had been smoking most of the evening.I was devastated, feeling guilty about my past. She came to me with her cute little gifts. No one(not even my fans) has ever gifted me stuff with my favourite things made on it.She somehow helped me out of the bizzare state that I was in.