I was the real stereotype of the ideal life.
Yeah, damn stereotypes.
And then I met him. With his green eyes, with his weirdness... And with his illness.
"What would you do if you only had 100 days to live?" - Anonymous
"I don't know. Probably wou...
Arthur Koestler said, "Pain has limits, fear has no limits." Not being afraid of pain is the most dangerous thing, because without fear we see no limits. I've never been afraid of pain.
*** Louis' pov
«I can't believe it.»
«That's enough.»
«No, how's that?!»
«Shut up, Anonymous.»
I sent him a countdown of days «27», and we decided that today we will watch the movie "The Beginning". We finished it, and everything would have been fine, but I didn't understand anything at all. He began to explain. I still didn't get it. He explained it to me a second time. Again, I didn't understand anything of the movie. He explained it to me a third time, and it got even worse.
«Louis? Are you there?»
«No. I was offended."
«But it's not difficult. Look, there...»
«I'm warning you, if you start your pseudo-scientific explanations again, I'll smother myself with a pillow.»
It seemed to make him laugh. Then he decided that we should be on an equal footing, and said that he did not know how to play Tetris, that he never understood the meaning of this game. It's my turn to laugh. He is the brain of philosophy, understands the essence of the most complex film in the world, but can not cope with the folding of squares. I tried to explain it to him, but here's the thing: it's almost impossible to explain the rules in words, so I drew him a picture.
«You're going to drive me to my grave, you know?»
«Can't I laugh anymore?»
«No.»
«You're cruel.»
«Shut up. Hold on.»
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«Did you draw a cat?»
«People most often think it's a rabbit. I'm making progress.»
«To be honest, I doubted it.»
«Okay, do you at least understand the rules?»
«Not really. The smiley face distracts me.»
«Next time, I'll send you a Wikipedia link.»
«No. Wikipedia doesn't have your handwriting and they don't draw rabbit-like cats.»
I don't know why, but his last sentence made me smile. I've been smiling all evening. Even though he was mocking me, it was the first time in seventy-three days that I felt him smile, too.
***
"Make yourself comfortable, the doctor will take care of you."
She pulls the curtain shut and leaves me alone. I sigh and look around. I've always hated hospitals. The smell of medicine, disinfection, white walls and all that... I look at everything I can and rub the edge of my T-shirt in my hands. Eventually I sit down on the bed, legs dangling, and look at my watch every two minutes. Where the hell is the doctor? After an eternity that lasted fifteen minutes, he finally comes. He peels off the Band-Aid and looks at the stitches. One by one, he slowly pulls them back, telling me about his life, but I don't listen to him. I'm too busy. I'm busy squeezing and unclenching the rubber ball in my hand, telling myself over and over again,"Don't think about the pain." I don't know if this is a psychological trick, but this trick actually works. It doesn't hurt.
