Shot In The Dark [Book 1]

4.7 - Memories And Videos

"Margo you have a doctor's appointment." Koleton calls out through the house as I roll out of bed.

"Coming!" I call out, slipping my shoes on and leaving my room without bothering with my appearance.

It's been a few weeks since we got home from tour and Calum and I managed to make up finally.

Recently it's been harder to remember the smaller things. For example, I forgot I was hanging out with Calum and the guys while they were sitting in the same room as me.

Thats why we scheduled the doctors appointment today, which I clearly forgot about.

The ride to the doctor office is quiet and I nearly forget we're in the car. As soon as we sit down, the doctor calls us back for the appointment and I feel my palms get sweaty.

"Miss Roberts, it's so nice to see you again. What are you here for today?" My doctor smiles as she sits across from me and I let out a shaky breath.

"My memory, it's getting worse." I whisper and she nods.

"How long has this been happening?" She asks, not taking her eyes off the computer.

"Around a year." I look down at my hands as I dig my nails into my skin three times.

"Alright I'll ask you a few more questions, then we'll get you in for testing and see what's going on that we can't see from here. Okay?"

I nod quietly, leading her to continue with the questions.

I haven't been able to separate reality from fantasy and I can tell it's hurting my relationship with Calum. He's trying so hard though, and I can't thank him enough for that.

After a few hours of waiting for the test results, the doctor finally enters the room again.

I smile excitedly, my smile only dropping quickly as soon as I see the emotion on her face.

"It's not good." I look at her and she hands me my MRI.

"These are the scans we got back, and it's not looking good. Your eating disorder has caused you to have a tumour, which you can see on the left side of the scan." She explains as she sits down and I feel my stomach drop.

"How much is the surgery? Is it deadly?" I quickly begin asking questions and she looks down. "There's no possible surgery."

"No, there's not. We can give you medicine to slow the effects, but we caught it too late. Its not confirmed that it'll kill you..."

"But it's a more than fifty percent chance." I whisper. I've read on this type of thing and almost no one survives. This tumour eats at people's decision making and memory side of their brain. "I'll keep losing my memory more and more."

"Yes, you will, but you can start writing everything down or recording your favourite moments. As reminders of your life."

I stand up from the examination table I'm seated on and nod. "Thank you."

———

I've been sitting in the guys' living room in silence as they loudly continue with their lives around me. Is this how it's going to be when I'm gone? Are they just going to keep living as if I was never here?

Everything feels different now. Its almost as if the world is saying good bye to me.

"Margo, did you hear me?" Ashton laughs and I snap out of my trance.

"No, sorry, but I have something to show you guys." I shake my head and reach into my bag, pulling out the MRI's.

"What are these?" Luke grabs them and examines them as the others crowd around him.