Chapter 16- lost

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*Edited*

-Parker's POV-

       Fear. Fear is what struck me when jaylen started to avoid me. She didn't look at me, she stopped smiling, she didn't walk me to class like she had been for the past month. She was becoming distant and cold.

       I don't know what I did to make her feel like she couldn't talk to me. I felt it; I felt her cry for help. I saw it in her eyes when she began pushing me away. At first it started with her saying she couldn't hang out.

        With her saying she has stuff to do and she'll talk to me later. That she would call later but never did. Something was eating her alive and I felt it every time I got near her.

      Truth be told I missed her. I didn't think I would, but fuck I do. I missed her smile, her cold hands in mine. The way she held me tight at night when I cried. Every time she kissed me. I missed it, I missed her.

     And I'm not going to let her leave me without an answer. I walk up to her door and knocked. Abby opens the door "is jaylen home?" All she does is shake her head.

      She was about to close the door on my face but I stuck my foot in between the door and said "I call bullshit" I past her and run upstairs to my loves room.

       I hear abby and Sonia chasing me trying to stop me from opening her door. I push pass them and open the door to jays room.

      It's a mess to say the less. Not the normal kind of messy but the angry kind. She completely ignores me and keeps her eyes closed. "Leave." I couldn't leave her.

      Not now. She looked horrible. Her perfect hair is a rats nest, her eyes full with sadness. "No, not till you tell me why you're avoiding me" she looks at me tears threatening to drop out of her grey eyes. "I'm not avoiding you, I already got what I want now I don't need you" I shake my head in denial. "What me and you had wasn't real Parker"

       I keep shaking my head "no,no,no you're lying, it was real, please don't say that because it was real to me!" All she gives me is a blank face " if it was real to you then you need a reality check."

      She got up and pushed me out of her room. I hear a click knowing that she locked the door.

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-jaylen POV-

     Fear. Shame. Anger. Rage. All emotions I get to feel at once. All the emotions triggered by one person. Parker's mom.

Flashback

      I look at Alana Parker's mom standing besides the Everett household. I was hoping to see Parker but all I got was her. She gave me a look of disgust " what will happen when Parker knows you lied to him about what you do. What will happen when he finds out your the bitch the shot a man in the alley. What will happen when he finds out that you're a murderer. Parker has something going on for him. You? You're all ready tainted by the blood of someone else. Let him go if you love him so much. Don't fuck him up like you fucked yourself up"

End of flashback

     Her words stuck fear in me. I want Parker to Succeed and he can't do that with me holding him back. I love him but as much as I love him I have to let him go. His mother was right i lied to him about what the reaper does.

     I lied about the rumors. Lost is what I feel. I'm angry and furious she would say that but she's right. I'm being selfish by keeping him by my side.

       He's everything I'm not and being with him would fuck him up. I don't want that. He deserves more than a murder for hire.

     That night when I came home late to Parker. I was doing a job. A job my father asked me to do. And while doing that job I shot a man after he tried to force himself on to me.

      Everything was a mess and I can't do this. It was time i went back to my fathers house. Losing Parker is like losing a piece of myself. Although I had Parker for just 1 month it was the happiest month of my life. And I want it to keep it that way.

         I don't want Parker's memory of me being that of a murderer. His mother threatened me that if I don't get away from her son she'd expose my secrets to him.

          She tells him and my life would be over. I would lose Parker and he wouldn't look at me the same again. I'd rather give Parker an image that I used him if it keeps him away from me. It's for his own good. Remember it's for his own good.

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A/N: don't forget to vote and comment my loves I know this is a short chapter but I'll make it up to you I promise.

        -XxX

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