𝕄𝕆𝕋𝕀𝕍𝔼. || Lando Norris

✨Part-63✨

Claire had to do this, she was going to lose her sanity otherwise. She spent her whole week thinking about the session with Akira, she really did struggle with vulnerability. Her therapist was probably going to yell at her for the rash decision she was about to make but it had to start somewhere right?

She picked up her phone and called him up, it went straight to voicemail. Lando was probably busy, she realised this was probably good for her. As in she wouldn't have to tell him, but rather record a message for him to hear.

Hey Lando,

You're probably on your way to Monaco right now, and I don't even know why I'm doing this but I feel like it's necessary.

When we saw each other for the first time, I'm sorry I frightened you by planting a kiss! We kissed, we made love and we parted our ways. I mean that's what a hook up is right? If I could go back to  that night, I would change just one thing. I wouldn't have left the minute I woke up.

Anyway, we're past that. I was a random hookup to you and that's what you were to me. Getting pregnant wasn't part of the plan and I would not change that for the world. Ophelia is the best thing that has ever happened to me. But that's not where the problem is! The problem is, I didn't intend on depending on you, like ever. And yet here you were, so kind, patient and charming in your own silly way.

And before I knew it, I was falling. I was falling really hard and really fast! By February, on my birthday I was 100 percent sure I felt something for you. And it wasn't just because I was carrying our baby.

Did I ever tell you about how beautiful I think your eyes are? Well every time you looked at me, I dove further into them. Every attempt I made to push you away only made crave you even more, and that's when I realised Lando! You had my heart! You had my whole heart!

And in our true fashion of always rushing into things, while I found Woking to be very dull and slow, let me tell you living with you wasn't. Was it rushed? Yeah it was, maybe we should have taken things slower but I wouldn't give it up for the world.

While I did start feeling like things were crumbling apart, I think we could have fixed it. I should have been better at telling you what I needed. And I did wish you were a tad bit better at telling me what you wanted from me.

I just wanted to let you know, that...I love you. I always will. But I have a feeling we've drifted way too far for me to even salvage what remains of it.

I need you to know that you get my heartbeat racing, you make me smile like a fool and you're the man of my dreams. I've hurt you way too much to even deserve a second chance, I understand if you've moved on since Bahrain. I had to tell you because I couldn't bring myself to live on without telling you what I felt.

Claire took a deep breathe after recording that message, her breath was long drawn and shaky. But she felt like a burden had been lifted off of her. Did she really want him to hear this? Within a flash second she had deleted the voice message.

She told herself that future Claire was going to be proud of her for deleting that message. And just like that it felt like the burden had returned, but she was willing to power through it. In fact this is what she had prepared herself for right? Let it all die out, because it wasn't worth it.

What Claire wasn't aware of, was that Grace had been standing outside the room, eavesdropping the whole time. She had heard her daughter pour out her heart about loving this man. Grace felt a smile tug on her face, as much as she had ridiculed their whole arrangement, she knew that it wasn't just kids being kids.

Claire needed a distraction, she texted her friends to see what they were up to. All of them were busy, she thought of going to the park with Ophelia. But Ophelia was still napping, she could perhaps annoy her mother on the one public holiday she had gotten she thought.

"Mom! What are you up to?" She asked entering the living room.

"What do you think I do on holidays apart from watching TV all day?" She laughed.

"Oooh what's on TV?"

"He's just not that into you."

"Are you saying that to me or?"

"The movie silly!" She chuckled, "now come sit down and don't make a noise both the cranky children are asleep."

"Did you call dad a cranky child? Oh I'm telling him when he's awake."

"Oh hush!" Her mother laughed.