Heads or Tails ?

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Lucy's pov

"Oh hey." I greet as I walk into the library, freezing into my tracks and Harry looks up at me from his book and gives me a tired smile.

We all look exhausted.

Sleeping last night was very weird.

For the first time since I arrived into this house I had to go to sleep alone, without Moon in the bed next to me, giving me a kiss goodnight and waking me up with hugs and cuddles.

I felt very lonely... and sad, alone in the room.

I didn't sleep much, and when I came downstairs this morning I quickly realized that I wasn't the only one who was exhausted.

Liam was drinking a huge mug of coffee while Jules laid half on top of his body on the sofa, looking very close to just falling back to sleep.

They were the only one already awake, apart from Zayn, who was making some food in the kitchen.

He ended up cooking for me too and we ate together at the table, talking a bit until I said I was going to go read for a while in the library, wanting to finish a book I started last week.

"Sorry I didn't expect anybody to be there, I'll just go." I apologize, turning back around and going to leave the room but Harry stops me.

"No, no Lucy, it's alright, you can stay." he says and I glance behind my shoulder at him.

"You don't mind ?" I check. "Cause I can go read in my bedroom if you want to be alone, really it's okay." I continue and Harry shakes his head.

"I don't mind, at all." he gives me a smile and I nod, turning back around and walking closer to the sofas and chairs in the middle of the room.

"Is Louis okay ? I haven't seen him today." I ask before I can stop myself and Harry looks up again, this time putting his book down and sitting up on the sofa, resting his clasped hands in his lap.

"He's going to be okay I think, he just needs a bit of time to process all of this," he answers and I sit down on the sofa across from him. "How are you ?"

"I'm a bit tired, but otherwise I'm pretty much alright."

"We didn't really get to speak much after everything that happened in the past few weeks, but I wanted to tell you that well, I'm there um, if you need to speak about what happened to you or whatever." he says then, looking a bit shy as he darts his eyes to his hands, twisting his rings and playing with his fingers.

"We all got our shitty trauma, it doesn't mean yours isn't valid or anything, I just mean that you'll never be judged. We've all gone through very fucked up stuff, that's partly why we're here. We created a new family because our last ones were hell."

"Was your family awful ?" I ask quietly and Harry nods.

"My mom wasn't around and my dad was an abusive drunk, I didn't know what family was before I met Liv." he explains.

"They're both dead ?"

"My mom I don't know, and I honestly don't care, and I killed my dad when I was sixteen." he says it like he just told me he ate pasta for dinner, and my eyes widen a bit at his words.

The way he speaks about murdering his own father is so detached that it's easy to see he doesn't have any remorse. I can only imagine what happened to make him this cold about it.

"After that I took Liv away from her own house and family and we left together, she was only fourteen at that time. We took an apartment, and it's been just the two of us since then." he continues, a hint of sadness in his voice when he speaks about Liv.