Speak up already - Phan

Chapter 46

A/N:

T/W: Mentions of self-harm
(If you don't wanna read this chapter private message me and i'll tell you what happened x)

xx

A week had passed from Phil making that decision. Nobody  noticed. He even stopped making videos because the voices in his head wouldn't get out. Everything got worse.

As days passed, his eyes got dimmer. His face began to turn a paler colour and he was always locked up in his room, skipping meals.

This wasn't just because of a few petty comments. It was triggering. Phil had survived for so long, but little things like this was what triggered those horrific thoughts back into action.

Phil, Dan doesn't love you anymore.

Yes he does, Dan loves me! He's my husband, of course he does!

Then how come he hasn't noticed what's happening to you?

...Dan's been busy.

Too busy for his own husband? How absurd! Phil, face the facts. He's not interested in you anymore.

But I've stopped talking, what more do you want?

Do you remember that little thing you use to do to yourself a long long time ago? The thing that would make this all go away?

No.

Phil, cut.

No.

Phil it will release all the pain.

Please no.

It will soothe the pain.

Please no no no.

It will get rid of the pain.

By this point, Phil was screaming, shaking and whimpering under his bed sheets as he cried for help. But Dan was out. So nobody heard poor Phil doing something he hadn't done in years, cry himself to sleep, clutching a kitchen knife.

*******

Dan knew he was being a terrible.husband. He promised himself that this would be the last trip and he would return to his precious husband for good. No more other visits for a long while since he hadn't seen Phil in a month.

Dan slowly turned the keys, unlocking their front door and shutting it behind them. The house was eerily silent. He knew something was up since Phil never answered his texts or calls anymore.

Dan creaked around their apartment, looking for Philm concluding that he was probably in their room. He slowly turned the door handle, opening the door.

When he opened the door, inside lay Phil, sitting in the corner who was what was hopefully passed out.

Dan rushed over to Phil, shaking him awake. When he opened his eyes, they were a dull grey colour and he had bags with his skin a pale shade.

"Kitten what happened?!" Dan gasped, cupping Phil's cheeks and pushing back his greasy hair.

Phil quickly shook his head in return making Dan's eyes wide.

"Phil...Phil what happened." He said sternly which just resulted in making Phil flinch.

Dan sighed, unwillingly getting his phone out and opening his notes, handing it to Phil. Phil shakily took the phone into his hand and Dan could see how bony his hands were, showing that he had hardly been eating.