Speak up already - Phan

Chapter 2

Phil's POV

I can't believe I just told this boy I suffer from depression. I barely know him! I don't even know his second name! The only thing I do know, is thatI don't trust him. He might become popular and tell everyone about it my problems if I do ever trust him.

Then i'll start getting bullied. They'll torment me for being the weirdo who never speaks. They might do the same thing he did to me.

Stop thinking like that! Your thinking negative thoughts again!

Your so stupid.

I'm not!

Of course you are!

I'm not!

You are Phil, why can't you see that your stupid, pathetic, vile, ugly, unwanted, unloved, a bother disgusting, ignorant-

I quickly stumble up from my seat, running out of the classroom hurriedly, barely being able to carry my bag over my shoulder. I feel as if i'm about to vomit.

I run to the boys toilets, leaning over in a locked cubicle, breathing heavily.

No, i'm not any of those, i'm not!

After 10 minutes of trying to calm myself down after vomiting, I stand up, unlocking the door and observing my face in the bathroom mirrir.

Hideous.

But i'm not that bad!

You are Phillip, stop lying to youself.

I feel a tear drip down my face, but quickly wipe it away. I have to get back to class. I grab my bag, about to leave when the door bursts open, entering Daniel.

I frown at him, looking slightly confused also. He looks worried for some reason.

"Are you okay? T-The teacher told me to run after you, but I got lost. Did you vomit?" He looks at me with those sympathetic eyes again, but wipes it off and replaces it with angry yet caring ones.

I timidly nod, rubbing my eyes a little. He takes a step closer making me step back, as he inspects my eyes.

"W-Were you crying?" He asks quietly.

I nod again, feeling ashamed this time. I feel his gaze on me and desperetly try to avoid it. Instead I stare down at my hands, tiddling my fingers nervously.

"Where's your little notepad thingy?" He asks.

I point to my bag, unzipping it and taking out the little black book. He nods once he's seen it.

"So, the teacher...he said he thought you might be sick, and then said I should....um, help you. He's really nice, he said we can leave whenever, as long as your health is okay."

I smile. Mr Anderson was really nice at times, he actually cares about the well being of his students and not just their knowledge.

I look up to see Dan grinning widely. It's a little creepy to be honest.

I grab my pen that I keep with the notepad and write down:

Why are you staring at me like a creep?

He sees it and chuckles. "I don't look that creepy when I smile do I?

I shake my head, smiling again and writing:

No, no I was just joking :P

He smiles again. I smile too.

"I like your smile, it's nice, that's why i'm grinning like a weirdo." He laughs.

I shake my head, furrowing my eyebrows as I write him a response.

No it's not.

He gives me a disbelieving look. "Of course it is! How can you not see?!"

I shake my head again. He rolls his eyes at me.

"Whatever, just because you don't believe it doesn't mean I don't have to. I think you have a lovely smile Phillip Lester."

I blush, smiling a little again. Wait, how does he know my full name? I don't remember the teacher ever telling him. I don't care, I like his compliment. I write back something for him.

Thank you Daniel :) Your smile isn't creepy.