Speak up already - Phan

Chapter 15

A/N:

I'm reuploading this because for some reason it comes up blank for some people which makes me wanna cry :'( Aww I had to delete everybody's lovely comments :'(

This chapter might be a little confusing so just remember this.

Flashbacks : italics

What Anna says out loud to Dan during them : Bold

Also if you could pleeeease check out my new story 'Love Triangles' that would be great thanks! x

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"Well...as you probably know...Phil has a broken past, that he hates to remember let alone talk about to anybody. I guess I sort of begged him to tell me a while back and I never asked him about it again. Dan i-it's horrible. You have to promise me that you will not leave Phil after telling you this. He needs you."

Dan bit his lip and nodded. "Okay, just tell me, what happened?!"

"Many things Dan...b-but i'll start from the begenning."

"Phil and I were walking home from school, nothing unusual. I think we were in year 6, and everything was fine. Obviously, Phil talked then, he didn't just suddenly stop talking, things led to that. Bad things."

"Anna come on the swing with me!" A little innocent Phil says.

I roll my eyes and run to the swing besides him.

"I bet I can go higher than you!" I giggle happily, kicking my feet up trying to swing higher.

I hear Phil also laugh, kicking his feet further trying to get higher.

"We were playing on the swings, and...and some year 9's...they-they were so...so cruel! All I heard was laughter from Phil before...some kind of yelp of pain to see that he had been pushed off the swing, blood oozing from his shoulder, arm and leg. As a little girl, I screamed and got a stranger's attention who then called an ambulance. Phil's parents weren't happy at all. They thought either I pushed Phil off or that he was stupid and fell off. Which were both wrong. He was pushed by somebody, I was sure of it."

"I-I'm sorry Philly, a-are you okay?!" I cry at Phil's hospital bed.

Phil looks down at his arm in a sling and shrugs.

"Don't be sad, I'll get better soon! But...I've always wanted to break my arm and I didn't know it hurt this much!" He winces slightly and smiles.

I giggle happily, wiping some of my tears before looking seriously at Phil.

"Some meanie pushed you off Phil."

"I know, just...just forget about it. I hope they are happy and those kind of people don't come back."

"Those kind did come back."

Phil and I were walking through the hallways at lunch talking about the latest anime we had watched over the weekend when we abruptly stopped.

"We were only naîve twelve year-olds and would always be around eachother in school. I rememver the day Phil first learnt what the word faggot meant."

We were met with a boy who had dark brown eyes and blonde hair. He looked at us and pulled a disgusting face.

"You're a faggot aren't you?!" He says in a mocking tone, pointing a finger towards Phil.

"Mummy and Daddy told me about your kind, they say you're disgusting! Anna get away from the nasty faggot."

I glare at the boy about to yell a bunch of insults to defend Phil when-

"W-What is a 'faggot'?" Phil asks curiously.

"You're one, it's someone who likes their own gender, which is weird." The boy spits.

"Why is that weird? They just like someone, it's not like they are forcing other people to like them too."

"NO! DADDY SAYS YOU'LL INFECT ME, THAT YOUR KIND ARE FROM HELL AND ARE UNPURE!"

"I think that was the first time Phil met a homophobe."

"A-Anna.." Phil asks quietly on our way home from school that day.

"Yes lion?"

"I-I...Is being a faggot always bad?"

"No Philly of course not, they are normally reffered to as gay, and all they are doing is loving someone, they can't help it!" I say sternly.

"A-Am I a faggot?"

"Gay, not faggot. And I don't know, it's only up to you to decide.Philly we are young so you shouldn't worry now, maybe when we grow up you'll know. And the would be nothing wrong with it if you were."

"It would take hours to name all the other bad things that happened to Phil. Let's just say that by age thirteen, he had depression. And everything got worse."

"Anna i'm coming over okay?" Phil said through the phone.

"It's late though...ask your mum to drive you." I say worriedly.

"She's at work like always. I'll walk, you don't live very far, I need company, see you in a bit, bye."

"Bye.."

"Phil didn't tell me what happened when coming to my house straight away. He looked terrible and I had to force it out of him after weeks. His clothes were muddy and ripped."

"Phil, I'm begging you, I'm your best friend, you can tell me, I promise I won't tell anybody!"

Phil bit his lip, tears escaping his eyes. "W-When I was walking to your house, I-I was stopped in the streets. There were three men. T-They pulled me into an alleyway a-and-and t-they-"

"They raped him. Disgusting perverts trapped my precious Phil, ripped him from his innocence and virginity at such a young age. He was broken after that. After he told me that, a week later he stopped talking. I don't know what those men planted into his mind, but it stayed. It stuck like superglue. He would always mutter it back when he talked just after he told me. He would say stuff like 'faggot musn't talk', 'faggot doesn't deserve to', and 'faggot is disgusting. You were helping to heal him Dan, slowly but surely. He didn't want to tell you because he felt so sure you'd leave him. And just when you were helping him heal, the thoughts those men planted into his brain made their appearance to the front...Again."

Dan sat staring at his hands feeling completely astounded.

"I-I...W-Why? He was an innocent little boy and now...now he thinks he is a monster!" Dan whimpered.

"He needs us right now. More importantly, you. He needs somebody to tell him that this isn't all true. W-When he wakes up." I said, making sure to say 'when' and not 'if'.

Dan let out a shaky breath, nodding agreeingly. "Y-Yeah, when he wakes up."