in love for the night // nate jacobs \\

38

( lei's pov )

my trip to chicago was brief and i enjoyed my time alone with my grandfather and papa but going back to east highland seemed dreadful. i had skipped a week of school to visit schools in chicago because i was slowly making the realization that i no longer wanted to be here.

the people of east highland seemed to live and breathe either a boring lifestyle or the toxicity. i knew for my own sake and sanity i should probably take that first plane ticket back out to chicago, but i needed more time to decide.

i hated that i thought about him, the entire trip. i hated that, my mind was on nate, and how me leaving would affect him.

i was in desperate need of a talk with my therapist but that would have to wait till tomorrow.

i walked into the building and walked over to my first class and sat in my usual spot wanting the day to pass me by.

i used my elbow to prop my head up as i scrolled through my emails ignoring my surroundings.

"where have you been?" kat asked looking at me with slight annoyance as she has a seat next to me. i knew it was because i hadn't answered a text or call. if i'm being honest i hadn't turned off my phone the entire trip to chicago and purposely kept it at home so i wouldn't have to deal with the bullshit.

when i turned on my phone for school today i seen countless phone calls and texts from everyone but i simply just deleted the texts and ignored the calls.

i sigh looking up at her, "went to visit my grandfather." i responded dryly. she didn't deserve that, but i was mentally drained.

"and you couldn't answer a text or a call?" her voice filled with concern and annoyance, once she seen my face. i probably resembled a talking corpse at this moment, just not as glamorous as tim burton's characters. i didn't do my usual makeup look. instead came bare faced, letting my eye bags breathe.

"i had personal issues to go through." i mutter before looking down at my phone. i was done. i was tired. honestly if it were up to me i'd probably drop out of school all together and run away, but ballet was my dream. she was the only hope that i had in me to push on. ballet was the only love that i would die for.

kat opens her mouth to respond, but what could she say. i was a girl she barely knew. who just came into her life one day and just as easily i could slip away. i had done it multiple times before so why should anyone be surprised.

after class i walked the halls, hood up avoiding everyone and anyone who came in contact with me. i didn't want to speak to anyone. was this my depression again?

it was a new year and i had already started off wrong. while other people celebrated their new years i was getting pulled away from an abusive ex boyfriend. the feeling all too familiar to me.

after my second class i decided to just leave. my parents would understand. they knew i wasn't myself.

right now i just wanted ice cream and some chinese food. my comfort foods.

i drove away from east highland high and made my way over to the super market. deciding i'll just pick up my ice cream then order my chinese for delivery. i walked the aisles making my way to the frozen food section looking over the ice cream selection.