Jisung wanted someone to love him and when all hopes seemed to have vanished, he simply had to try it online.
Nothing could go wrong, right?
~The story of a young man learning what true love means and feels like.
°•Chatfic!
°•Lots of fluff
°•Some An...
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☆•°Betrayed°•☆ •○°•○•°•○•°••●.°.•°○●•°•●.°.•
"Th-three...?" Jisung stuttered. He never knew.
"I don't want you to think any less of me but... two of them were one-night stand type of situations"
"One-night stands..? Why..?" His voice was small, curious.
"These two.. well.. let's just say I liked them. I really did" Changbins voice was slightly shaky and he seemed like he was trying to fight it back really hard.
"I don't want to talk about them really, but just so you understand; these two were people I really wanted to be close to. They both led me on and somehow we ended up doing that one night. I just wish I had realized earlier that they were... that they were only using me for meaningless pleasure."
"Binnie..."
"It's okay Ji. I'm over that already."
"If.. if you don't mind me asking.. what do you mean it somehow happened..?" Jisung hesitated to ask "And.. what do you mean with 'they'?"
Changbin sighed. He shouldn't have brought this up. It was obvious the boy would get curious.
"They got me drunk. But eitherway, I liked them, so I probably would've done it while being sober too." He spoke, not showing much emotion, trying not to reawaken those feelings from the past "Anyway, they got me drunk and convinced me to sleep with them. With both of them."
"Both? At the same time..?"
"Same time. Same night, same bed. Same stupid feelings of mine that were never returned!" Changbin slightly raised his voice at the end, frustrated at these painful memories. Frustrated that these things had to happen to him.
"These two boys were all my life revolved around. I gave them all I had and after that night, they simply dissappeared. I really don't want to get into detail about this topic though. I'm over it."
"I- I'm so sorry to hear that Binnie I..." Jisung really didn't know what to say. He regretted asking. He regretted further pushing to know more. He didn't want to rekindle these negative feelings inside the older.
However one thing he realized, it's that they both had made similar experiences with love in the past; In the form of not being loved back.
"You don't need to comment on it Ji. Didn't even think I'd ever tell you." He reassured the younger "I was immature back then, but now, I've moved on and I know I'm ready to love again. I want to love you Jisung."
The younger listened to these words, feeling like he was about tear up. Changbin seemed so strong. He was so honest and open to talk about this.
Jisung was thankful. Grateful for the fact the older didn't mind showing him that vulnerable side of himself. It's hard to talk about things from the past and he admired Changbin for being able to get himself to do that.
"Sung." The older spoke up again, getting the boys attention.
"Y-yeah..?"
"I don't want any of this to interfere with my life today, especially with us. What happened with these two was ages ago. It's over and I've moved on. I don't want you to waste a single second thinking about it okay? I don't want you to think any differently of me."
Jisung smiled weakly, sitting up on his bed and grabbing his phone from the side. He tried using the most soothing voice possible, wanting to calm the other down as he seemed extremely upset now.
"Why would I think any differently of you? Thank you for telling me, it means a lot. I'm just so sorry someone like you had to go through things like that. And don't worry, I know this won't change any of the things we have going on."
"You promise?" Changbin answered, seeming to have relaxed a little at that soothing and soft tone.
"Promise. You know I want to love you too Binnie.. I mean that. And I feel like we're heading towards the right direction." He finished with a smile, butterflies filling his stomach at the thought of the older.
Changbin smiled too. It felt good now that Jisung knew about this too. He isn't going to have to keep it to himself forever now and that feeling was just so liberating.
"I'm so lucky to have found you." He smiled, unable to keep his excitement in. He truly felt lucky. So grateful. So at peace.
"You're lucky? More like I am!"
"Let's say we both are!" The older laughed, Jisung mirroring the action.
"Oh and Bin..?"
"Mh?"
"Since we're talking about things openly right now.. and we started talking about us... I thought.." He sighed, having troubles with expressing his feelings and thoughts outloud ".. I'd maybe tell you about my feelings.. towards you.."
"Towards me?" Changbin smiled, getting even more excited "tell me babyboy."
"W-well.." He stuttered hearing that pet name, making him turn all jelly again.
"It's only been two months but, I feel like you know me more than some of my very close friends. We've talked for hours and hours every single day, more than I ever talk to anyone else and I feel like.. we managed to get to know a lot about each other in such a short period of time. And it makes me happy. I've never felt those things you make me feel. They're so different, you're so diffrent. You... you really are making me fall for you Seo Changbin.. and- and it's slightly scaring me."
Changbin was now the one to not know how to react. His heart almost pounded out of his chest as he listened to that sweet statement.
Through previous conversations, he had gotten to know that Jisung usually has troubles communicating his feelings and talking about them.
Now actually listening to him do it made him feel so proud at he fact that he had the courage to speak outloud.
"Jeez Ji." he chuckled, the younger only tilting his head to the side in confusion.
"Did I say something wrong..?"
"No, you're just so.. aghh!"
"I've never heard you almost squeal before." the younger giggled.
"Yeah I haven't ever seen myself like this either!"
"You love me, admit it already!" "Did Binnies heart flutter from what I said?" Jisung spoke in a mocking voice, hearing the other scoff in response.
