find your treasure! | treasure one-shots

♡ love to me || kim junkyu

✩ LOVE TO ME ✩

"Junkyu! Are you okay? What's up?"

You furrowed your brows, looking at your friend with a worried expression etched on your face.

"Couldn't sleep last night because of an assignment," Junkyu replied, surprised by how croaky his voice sounded. "I got it done, though." He cracked a small smile, hoping you'd believe him.

Because how could he possibly be honest with you? How could he tell you that when he finally collected the courage to ask you out — he found out you were asked out by someone else?

How could he tell you that when he went to the university's charity ball to find you last night, you were dancing with someone who wasn't him? How could he tell you that when he wanted to ask you out, he broke down instead because he saw you kiss someone?

How could tell you he wanted time to turn back just so he could tell you the three little words he's been wanting to tell you for the last two years? How could he tell you it broke him completely to see you look so happy in someone else's arms?

Just how ... could he say that the reason he spent the entire night in tears was because of you?

The answer, in short, was no. There was no way Junkyu could tell you any of that — because Junkyu would rather experience heartbreak, every single day, for the rest of his life, rather than not have you as a friend anymore.

He treasured you that much.

"See you after class?" You asked, oblivious to the thoughts that ran through his head. "Lunch?"

Junkyu nodded. "I'll be outside when your class finishes," he answered quickly, not trusting his voice enough.

"You are seriously the best, Junkyu! Love you!"

"I know. Love you too."

If there was anything Kim Junkyu sucked at; it was controlling his expressions. And carrying out this simple conversation with you took so much more willpower than he had thought. His emotional battery was draining speedily, so he did what he had to, quickly bidding his goodbyes as he walked away from you.

Turning around a corner as he fumbled with his phone, Junkyu sighed in relief as he saw his roommate standing in front of him. Park Jihoon was Junkyu's guardian angel of sorts, having stayed up all night with him as he cried the night before.

Upon seeing the similar expression on the younger's face, Jihoon ran to his friend, who looked like he was going to break down again. "Junkyu!" Jihoon held the male's face, sighing before pulling him into a hug. "Hey, it's okay. What happened?" He patted his back, glaring at anyone who looked at his friend weirdly.

"I don't think I can do it anymore, Jihoon. I tried talking to them, but I'm just reminded of what happened. How can I continue to talk with them normally when my mind constantly repeats those moments?" Junkyu sniffled, pulling away from the hug as his roommate took him to a secluded area. "I don't know what to do, Jihoon."

Jihoon thought for a bit, shrugging. "Maybe ... you should just get it off your chest," he suggested, breaking into a chuckle at the way the younger looked at him with wide eyes. "Okay, not my best idea."

"It's not." Junkyu let out a choked laugh, shaking his head as he wiped his tears. "I really like Y/N. I've liked them for the past two years. And the worst part is that I know I'll continue to like them."

"Kyu–"

"I know, I know. That's an absolute shit plan, but I just can't help it. If only liking someone for two years can be forgotten in two minutes, I would've done that last night itself, Jihoon."

"No, stop–"

"Who am I kidding? I'm just trying my best to bury all these feelings. I don't like Y/N, I love them — and I'm fucking doomed because of that." Junkyu groaned, smacking his hand against his forehead. "Love is supposed to be something beautiful, Jihoon. But I love Y/N, and love to me is loving them till the end of time, knowing that they'll never love me back."

Jihoon inhaled sharply, grimacing. "I tried to tell you, but you wouldn't let me fucking speak. Now deal with them." He placed his hands on the younger's shoulders before turning him around, letting him see the person who stood behind him.

And that person was none other than you.

Hearing Kim Junkyu say all those words was equivalent to a comet crashing on you. You weren't really sure what to do or what to say, and it clearly didn't help when the tears fell down your face, either.

"I'm sorry, Junkyu," you choked out, not really sure why you were apologizing. "I'm really sorry."

Was it because you felt bad for your friend for bottling his feelings for two years? Was it because you didn't return the feelings he had for you? Or was it because you did like him but didn't know what to do since you were with someone else now?

The possibilities were endless, and right now, you were crying in front of your best friend while apologizing for something you didn't know ... until a minute ago.

"You don't need to apologise, Y/N. It's not your fault." The male bitterly smiled, moving away when you stepped forward. "These are my feelings. I'll learn to handle them somehow."

You shook your head. "But I–" Your voice cracked, feeling your heart drop as you saw a teary-eyed Junkyu turn away from you.

"Like I said, Y/N ... love to me is loving you till the end of time, knowing you'll never love me back."

a/n: when i tell you the way i cried writing this, bc junkyu was me during my graduation afterparty. my best friend was like "you need to tell him how you feel!" and me, holding back tears, was like "bro, did you not hear? he has a girlfriend now." 

the only good thing that came out of that was the amount of songs i wrote about it (yes i entered my t-swift era) but ayo it's been two years and i'm still single and not happy but living a good life regardless