𝑫𝒆𝒂𝒅 𝑺𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒔 • yeonbin & taegyu ✓

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°•𝖙𝖗𝖎𝖌𝖌𝖊𝖗 𝖜𝖆𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌 • depression, mention of suicide attempt, suicidal thoughts•°

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𝕿𝖆𝖊𝖍𝖞𝖚𝖓 blinked his eyes slowly, trying to get used to the light, he turned to the side, seeing beomgyu holding his hand while looking down. the long haired seemed tired and weak, which made taehyun worried, he looked around, trying to remember what happened and finally laying his eyes on his arm, reminding himself he was bit.

"butterfly?" the shorter said slowly, his voice was hoarse from not talking in a while. when the long haired heard him, he jumped from his seat, standing up beside the male.

"hyun!" beomgyu held the younger's face between his hands, some of the tears that were running down his eye coming in contact with the male's face. the long haired started to sob, resting his forehead on taehyun's chest and not being able to speak properly. "i-i thought y-you w-weren't coming b-back."

"of course i was, i will always come back to you, butterfly." taehyun raised his now only hand and ran his fingers through beomgyu's hair gently.

"i k-know but it's b-been days a-and you weren't w-waking up s-so i thought-"

"wait, days?" the shorter sat on the bed, using his hand to clean beomgyu's wet face.

"you were out for four days." taehyun looked up, staring at yeonjun, who had his same expressionless face, but this time with really cold eyes.

"what happened?" the black haired tsked, turning around to leave, but before doing so he turned his head to the side, making taehyun stare at his side profile.

"nothing."

the shortest stared at the male while he left, not knowing what happened for him to act so oddly, he decided to ignore it though, wanting to focus on beomgyu, who he needed to apologize to.

"come here, butterfly." taehyun pulled the older to lay with him, making beomgyu rest his head on his shoulder. "i'm sorry for not being present, i won't do it again, okay? you're my everything, the most important thing in my life and i don't ever want to lose you."

beomgyu hid his face on the male's neck, finding comfort in him, he was glad taehyun didn't die. at least he was able to perform the surgery properly, not letting his mind take over and ruin everything, because the younger would probably be dead if that happened. the long haired took a deep breath, trying to calm down and stop crying, he didn't want to make a scene.

"it's okay, hyun. i know you were doing your best for me and the others."

"butterfly, you-"

"don't worry about that, i'm fine. nothing happened." taehyun furrowed his brows, not believing what the male was saying, of course it was much.

"no, butterfly, look at me." the male did as said, staring at taehyun's eyes. "it's not okay, please talk to me. i'll be there if you need, i know i wasn't but it was a mistake that i don't plan of repeating, okay? so please talk to me when you're not feeling well or have something bothering you, i will never be bothered by you, doesn't matter what."

"i don't want to talk about that right now, hyun." beomgyu averted his eye, he didn't want taehyun to worry about futile things like himself.

"okay." the male sighed. "you know i love you, right?" the younger held the other's face gently, trying with all his will to ignore the pain he was feeling on his arm. "i love you, so that means i love all of you. i love how bratty you are and how you always get yourself in trouble, how you always give your opinion even if everyone else's is the opposite or how you can't keep your mouth shut in the worst situations, and i love you even if you lost all of that after what happened to your eye. i'll always love you gyu, all your flaws and traumas and scars just as much as i love your qualities and heart and things you love."

"so please don't ever think i want to leave you or that i don't love you anymore, you're the best thing that happened to me and you're way more than i deserve. and if i will always come back to you, please always be here when i do it. you're my eternity just like i am yours, so don't ever think i love you a little less, because i will only love you more. you're not someone i will stop loving, butterfly."

beomgyu blinked before starting to sob uncontrollably, he felt guilty. how could he try to do this to taehyun? leaving him alone and killing himself, he felt selfish again, the word seemed to always haunt him everywhere he went. it was a really toxic way of thinking, it wasn't his fault nor was he selfish for if, but beomgyu couldn't think in another way.

"i'm s-sorry, i-i'm so s-sorry." the long haired cried on the younger's shoulder, hating himself for what he did.

"don't. you're hurting gyu, and you're allowed to, it doesn't matter if it will affect me or someone else. please let yourself be in pain, it's okay, you're not a machine, so you make mistakes and suffer when bad things happen. you didn't do anything wrong, so don't invalidate your feelings." taehyun caressed the older's cheek and smiled softly. "you yourself told me that, along with 'if it's bothering you, then it's much' and you were right, so please don't act like what you're feeling it's not important or is a simple drama."

beomgyu sobbed hard and nodded, throwing himself on the other. taehyun's eyes got teary and he bit his lips from the pain, not wanting to make the long haired pull away, he could take it as long as beomgyu felt better, it was just a pain in the arm, couldn't compare to his boyfriend's smile. he was glad they could talk, it was killing him the fact that his absence worsened how the older was feeling, so he promised himself he would never do that again.

taehyun wanted to be one of the reasons why beomgyu wanted to be alive, and not one of the reasons he wanted to die.

"i love you, butterfly."

"like eternity was a feeling?"

"yes, like eternity was a feeling." beomgyu smiled with a teary eye because of the answer, and sniffled.

"i love you too, like eternity was a feeling."

taehyun caressed his cheek and kissed him, making the long haired feel like he was in heaven. he missed the shorter so much, and finally being able to kiss him after days fearing him dying, healed a part of his heart. beomgyu felt like maybe he wanted to live another day so he could also kiss the younger that day, and maybe the next too.

beomgyu could take a little more if taehyun was beside him.

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