Living With The Game (Living Series #2)

Chapter 28

It was almost 2 days since the accident of my parents. Until now hindi ko pa rin maprocess and lahat. Even I was with Kuya and other relatives at the hospital, I wasn't even listening to the doctor's statement regarding my parents death. I wasn't prepared for this, I can't believe this is happening and I can't process everything.

"Hija, kumain kana muna. Mag-aalas dose na ng gabe hindi ka pa kumakain."

"Hindi po ako nagugutom, Manang." Mahina at walang ganang usal ko kay Manang Tess. 

Nahagip ng mata ko si Kuya kung saan napabuntong hininga ngunit pilit akong nginitian upang mapagaan kahit papaano ang pakiramdam ko. He's busy talking to some friends of our parents and some relatives. 

"Alam kong hindi ka kakain, but at least uminom ka ng tubig." 

Nag-angat ako ng tingin nang may mag-abot ng baso ng tubig sa akin. It was Patrice. She was with me eversince ma-fix ang lamay nila Mama. Kapag uwian, kasabay ko na siya patungo rito until the sun rises, some of my friends are visiting as well pero hindi naman pweding magdamag pero kahit papaano ay nakikiramay sila. She cares my back while I was drinking the water she gave me, and I just gave her a small smile para malaman niyang I'm good well in fact I'm not. 

Napatingin ako sa entrance ng lugar kung saan nakalamay ang magulang ko, I was expecting him to come. I took my phone to check if he replied pero wala. I messaged him when I was panicking and being so down of my parents death. I even tried to call him to reach him out but it was just ringing and sometimes binababa ang call. How come he was able to take down my calls and didn't even check my messages. I sighed in distress. I really don't want to cry right now. I don't even know how I feel. Being so brokenhearted of my parents death and not being able to come for me when I was down. 

"No replies at all?" 

Napatingala ako kay Patrice bago muling napayuko dahil alam kong nakita niya ang screen ng cellphone ko. And she knew I needed him.

"I was trying to reach him out as well, but he is not responding. I tried to ask his friends pero hindi rin daw nila masyadong ma-reach dahil nasa booth camp na raw siya. He finished all his academic requirements para wala na raw siyang masyadong aasikasuhin once nasa booth camp na siya." 

"Nasa booth camp na siya?" I asked again as I look at her and she nodded.

I bit my lower lip because it was already shaking and I know I was about to cry that's why Patrice hug me while she was standing. I remember all the things that we were talking about regarding his passion in gaming industry. I thought all the issues we've been through, I supported him, even there is part of me that it would hard for me knowing that he's with Lorraine. Pero wala akong magawa dahil nagtitiwala ako sa kaniya at mahal ko siya. Pero bakit naman ganito, bakit naman walang paramdam, bakit naman wala akong kaalam-alam.

"We are not yet done, Pat. We didn't broke up. We are just taking rest because of what happened. But why does it feel like he was already cutting ties with me." Paos at nanghihinang usal ko kay Patrice.

Pagod na pagod na ako sa lahat ng nangyayari. Hindi ko alam saan ako kukuha ng lakas. 

"Joanna," 

Our moment got interrupted when a guy immediately showed up. Patrice removed her arms around me as well. 

"N-Nash?" 

I immediately stood and wipe my whole face. He spread his arms and that was the moment I come into his arms. The arms that used to be my comfort zone. 

After a moment of comforting, we are both standing in front of my parents coffin. 

"I wasn't even prepared for this. We just saw each other in France, Tito... Tita." Ani Nash bago hinaplos ang balikat ko dahil nakaakbay ito sa akin. 

"I was so excited that Tito and Tita would tell you how we cross each other's path in France." Usal pa nito habang nananatiling nakatingin sa magulang ko.

"What are you doing in France?" Tanong ko dahil sa New York ito nakatira at nag-aaral.

"Well... having a three days vacation. And it was already my last day when I crossed path with Tito and Tita, we ate together and they even invited me to watch fashion show..." mahina itong natawa ngunit ramdam ko ang lungkot doon. "even if they knew I wasn't into it. And guess what?" huminto ito 'tsaka humarap sa akin. "they even told me everything about your love life, as in everything. So who is this lucky guy named Willliam?"

Nash is my childhood best friend. He was my friend ever since grade school up until high school but then he needed to go with his parents in New York for her mother's treatment. Ayaw ng parents niyang ipaubaya ito sa lolo at lola or even sa mga kamag-anak nila dahil baka kung anong maging kahihinatnan ng kanilang anak. I don't know his family's history but maybe they just don't trust them to take care of Nash. He was a kind human being, he used to protect me and even Kuya kahit na mas matanda si Kuya sa kaniya. Close sila ng parents ko dahil nga he was a protective kid. 

Mahina akong natawa dahil suddenly nag-flash sa isip ko kung paano magkwento sila Mama. 

"W-well, he is kinda busy right now, he is currently in a booth camp, h-he's in gaming industry." I gave him a sincere smile and not-to-worry smile so he wouldn't complain. 

He stared at me for a second, scanning my whole existence and hopefully he wouldn't bother asking anything. 

"Anyway, have you eaten?" He then asked before sitting on the chair in front of mine.

"Wala akong gana,"

"Well ako meron. Let's eat dahil wala naman akong ibang kakilala rito maliban sa 'yo, your Kuya and Manang Tess. Pero dahil busy sila, eh ikaw nalang. Besides alam nating hindi nagugustuhan nila Tito ngayon ang ginagawa mong hindi pag-kain."

I sighed before looking at my parents' coffin before returning my gaze at him, he gestured his head to come with him and I called one of my relatives to replace my position before following Nash. 

While we were eating, sobrang daming kwento ni Nash. Masaya ako dahil magaling na ang Mommy nito. Her Mom is a cancer survivor and I'm so happy for him and her Mom. He even told me about a girl he used to like but then the girl has a girlfriend. He even acted being hurt while holding his chest. And then he told me as well how a guy used to like him, although he is not against gay people it's just that he is not interested and the guy who likes him gives him creep. Knowing Nash na minsan tarantado rin, he acted as gay everytime he knew the guy was around. 

"Baliw ka talaga," natatawang usal ko dahil sa kagaguhan nito.

"Nahihiya kasi akong kausapin siya or even say na I'm not interested, also he keeps on following me that's why napilitan talaga akong gumamit ng ipinagbabawal na technique."

And we continued laughing and listening to each other's story and journey. At some point I forgot I was being so down these days. I was being so exhausted at everything. I'm glad I have friends and have family left with me to comfort and be with me at my darkest time. 

I'm always waiting for him to come and comfort me. At least reply on my messages and call.  I'm always trying to reach him out, but it was hard enough knowing he keep on avoiding me, or maybe his feelings fade away. I haven't tried going into their house because I don't want his family find out what happened, and I'm not good at directions. We didn't even broke up but I guess this is the end of us, which I wasn't even ready for.