Should′ve never let you go

let me sneak you out

Emery

I closed the laptop and sat there for a few more minutes before I decided to wear something else. So I went into the bedroom, because of course I wanted to wear something from Harry. I grabbed one of his t-shirts and exchanged mine. I briefly looked at myself in the mirror, the blue wreath on my wrist, it was on which my attention was much. I was sorry for Steve, I just let him sit like that, maybe we could have talked again. Even that probably didn't help, I wanted to be with Harry. I would only have postponed the thing with Steve, I just hoped that he was well. I can't understand why I was still worried about this man, he had hurt me so much and yet I wanted him to be fine. What was going on? My mental health was broken, I couldn't think clearly anymore. I thought I was so sure about everything. So I counted the days until Harry came home and would try to help me. Two more days. The day after tomorrow he would be there. I hid in his big bed, it was strange to lie there alone. I wasn't even sure if we were together or not. I took a deep breath. Emery, calm down. All my needs were put back. Hunger? No way, the stress was my meals. I hadn't eaten for days and even now I didn't feel like it. I just lay there, looked like death in person and kept rubbing tears out of my eyes, because crying had not stopped. I unlocked my phone and scrolled through all the apps to pass the time until I fell asleep. I don't know how long I lay there but when I woke up my battery was empty and the sun was already shining. I opened my eyes, briefly I tried to realise what time it actually was but I had no chance, the fatigue still had me firmly under control. I quickly closed my eyes again and tried to think clearly, then I stretched out and sat up. I rubbed my face and looked around. So it really wasn't a dream. The whole thing here was real. I was sitting in Harry's bed. I plugged my cell phone into the charging cable and got up to look out the window and see the weather. So I pushed the gray striped curtains aside and looked directly at the garden. The grass was bright green and was illuminated by the sun. It was just idyllic and I decided that it was time to do some sport again. So I brushed my teeth and put on my blue leggings and the matching sports bra before I went outside, where my thoughts went back towards Steve. Why couldn't I stop thinking about him? It killed me that my head still seemed to be so attached to him and I wondered when all this had come to an end. I briefly shook myself before I would start crying again and put a small bottle of water on the lawn. I started stretching a little before I did a few exercises. Again and again my thoughts revolved around yesterday. Would Steve just think of me? Would he come by? Did he even know where Harry lives?! All this was crazy, but also scary. I was afraid that worse could happen. When he grabbed me so much by the wrist, I had not yet felt such a fear in his presence and I never wanted that again. All this buzzed around in my head while I finished my work out. I took a large sip of water and then went into the shower. Here I always cleared my head, thought of nothing and enjoyed the water on me. I was torn out of the pleasant silence by the banging of the front door. I turned off the water and left the shower. Who could that be? Only Harry's mother had another key. I quickly put something on and went down the long marbled stairs. "Hello?!" I called and it echoed through the entire house. Nothing. No answer. I looked around and called again. Nothing again. When I was about to go upstairs again, I heard someone behind me. „Well, what are you sneaking around here??"