Chapter 88 - Summertime (II)

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In the heat of July, Catherine's carriage circled round and round a block in the capital. She gazed out the window, bored to death and suffocating. No one had told her how hot it was going to be! Baroness Bryant had returned to the Bryant country estate with Lady Briana, but Father had wanted her to stay so they could take advantage of the absence of Lady Bryant and Lady Valentina.

Catherine was extremely uncomfortable with the idea, but it wasn't like she could tell that to Father. He and Uncle let her sit in on their meetings with the expectation that she would remain silent and simply learn their finalized instructions. Father occasionally asked for her opinion, when he remembered her presence, but she knew from the meaningful gaze Uncle always gave her to keep her silly ideas to herself. They knew the world much better than she did, after all.

'Then why haven't you told them about Lord Damian yet?'

Catherine shifted in her seat and frowned at her conscience. If she asked them about him, she was almost certain that they would order her to stop seeing him, and she didn't want that. Ever since Lady Valentina's birthday ball, gifts had started arriving at their mansion, from an anonymous admirer. Father had been glad that her reputation was good enough to have one, but when he'd asked if she knew who it was, she actually lied to him! Oh, what had become of her?

Her thoughts kept wandering back to Lord Damian, and she blushed whenever she did think of him. He was too good to her, sending her multiple bouquets of flowers, small jewels that were prettier than they cost so as to not arouse suspicion, a bottle of perfume, a jar of face cream, chocolates, candies, and more than she could remember. She had to repay him somehow, or reject him quickly to not lead him on. Yet for the life of her, she couldn't bring herself to!

Catherine almost crushed the small dry flower in her palm and quickly let go to make sure it was all right. It wasn't any kind she'd ever seen before and must have been dead for very long, as it seemed incredibly fragile, but thankfully was still intact. Father had given it to her as a good luck charm for today's mission with oddly specific instructions, but she knew better than to ask questions. Nevertheless, he only had a few in his possession, so she mustn't waste it.

"My lady, can we go back yet? I think I'm going to burn to death in this sunlight!"

"Let's wait a little longer, Mary. I don't want to disappoint Father again. Would you like to come ride in the carriage with me?"

"Oh, no, I'd get scolded for sure! But my lady, it's probably not so nice stuffed in that little box either. I'm sure His Lordship will understand!"

"It's fine, Mary. Thank you for worrying about me!"

Catherine was touched by her maid's concern, though she had to patiently stand firm against her further attempts of considerate persuasion, which did sound very tempting. It was the least she could do for Uncle and Father, given how much she was betraying them already. The image of Lord Damian did its best to distract her from the overwhelming guilt she felt, but at present it all came rushing back.

Not obeying and disappointing Father and Uncle, intruding upon the happy family Father, Lady Bryant, and Lady Briana had, wounding Lady Valentina, who considered her a dear friend, and now Lord Damian. She ought to refuse him as soon as possible, but she didn't want to. Yet if she didn't, she'd make him think he had a chance, and that might end up hurting him even more, especially with how well he was treating her. Ack, what was she going to do?

She was so distressed that she almost missed Prince Oscar, stepping out of a building and flashing by in the window. Alas, as much as she wished otherwise, she did see him, and so she must carry out her responsibility.

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