VIRTUOSO - A MYG Story

GRAVE

GRAVE

Solemn and slow.

THE NEXT DAY

Hobi hadn't heard anything back from Yoongi since the previous night, despite leaving a bunch of voicemails and filling his inbox with texts asking where he'd gone. While it wasn't unusual for Yoongi to run off when he felt conflicted about something, he usually made a point to tell Hobi where he was going, or at least let him know when he'd be back. This time, even Hobi was ghosted out of his inner torment.

"Faye, please let me see you. Let's talk about this... You have no reason to feel bad. We are the ones who pushed you into this. I just need to know you're okay... Please."

I listened to him begging on the other end of the line, biting my lip to try and keep the tears from exploding out of me.

"Hobi... I've made such a big mistake." My voice cracked and I heard him tearfully sigh on the other end of the phone.

"What do you mean, baby?" he asked gently, trying to soothe me as he himself tried to hold it together, "You didn't do anything wro–"

"Stop," I interrupted him, "I agreed to every single thing we did. I ruined my body, my reputation, my self-respect..."

He waited, not saying another word as he let everything sink in.

"Hobi, I have no value left. I've given it all away. There's nothing left for the person I want to marry."

"You want to marry him?" he asked softly, trying to latch onto something more positive.

"Of course I do... But I can't now. How could I? What's left for Yoongi? Every time he looks at me, he'll see everyone else with me. Every time he sees the band, he'll remember all of you with me."

I listened to his quiet sobs on the other end as his own guilt took over.

"Faye..." is all he could say through his tears.

"I blame no one but myself. You all gave me a way out of this. Told me I didn't have to do it. But I did. I chose this. I've ruined my own life. Destroyed the best thing that's ever happened to me. And for what? Some temporary pleasure..."

He understood now and I could feel his remorse through the phone.

"I love you, Hobi. You've always been so good to me. Been such a good friend from the very first day I met you. Please don't walk away from this conversation feeling as if I blame you in any way. This is my own problem to face now."

"But it isn't yours alone, Faye. We share that burden with you. We told you that you were in charge of the situation and what happened to you, but we also told you we'd take care of you. Sure, everyone was upset and shocked by what happened last night, but we all knew the risks of this type of play. We knew it could get like this. All it takes is something triggering something else...

"I don't know what caused it. It came out of nowhere." I wondered out loud.

"You love him. And you saw that in this lifestyle, you couldn't possibly love him to the fullest if you shared yourself like that. I deeply respect you for sharing these feelings with me, Faye. You will need to talk to Yoongi about this. I can handle all the others..."