quicksand (Dazai X Reader)

special: it happened at last

//warning: smut// 

if you dont want to read this chapter its fine! it will not affect the story, just know that well, it happened. 

it is the first time I write smut so I am so sorry if it is cringy

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We were stumbling, running in the street like two lunatics getting away as if someone was chasing us, he was dragging me by the hand as he ran towards his apartment, on occasions he would just pull me into himself wrapping his arms around me and kiss me in the middle of the sidewalk, we were receiving a lot of stares of the passersby, and we just giggled. We have known for a while that there's a them and and us, and we were dancing on the border line. Dazai would pick me up and spin me around from time to time, and I kept wondering if he was drunk.

We made it into his apartment, heavy breaths from running up the stairs of the building. We were standing in front of his door, just looking at each other.

"Are you sure you want to go in? We can just turn around and go to yours, call it a night" He whispered, his tone was soft, almost caring.

I did take a second to think, it's not that I don't trust him or that I think he will hurt me, but this is crossing a line. We have been tiptoeing on top of blurry lines, uncertainty is a slow venom, at first it makes you feel elated, then it weighs you down. I wanted him closer, as close as he can be, but he is indeed the Devil, and I'm risking getting burned.

So I grabbed his face and kissed him, a softer kiss compared to the ones we have shared today. I think that enough is enough, if I am going to crash and burn might as well do it now. He kissed me back, and I heard him look for his keys and open the door.

I kept my eyes closed and I felt him pulling me inside the apartment and closing the door, and then pushed me into it. He started to take off my jacket, and I heard it touch the ground, and so I reached for the bottom hem of his jumper, and lifted it up. I felt him smile through the kiss, and he let me help him take it off, leaving him on his dress shirt. We kicked our shoes off holding onto each other so we didn't tumble into the floor.

This was messy, we were crashing lips and teeth in the dark with no intention of controlling the chaos.

He started to walk backwards, leading me into the living room by my waist and hips. We couldn't see in the dark room but he knew every detail in his home, his hands were running up and down my body as if he wanted to make a map out of it. With each kiss going down my neck I felt my consciousness go out of the window. The intoxicating feeling of desire made its way from my chest to my lower stomach.

My eyes were adapting to the dark and I could see we were near the couch and so I took the lead and drag us there, pushing him down with force so he was sitting down and he raised an eyebrow at me, I just smirked down at him and got on top of him straddling him, my knees on the side of his hips. I started to kiss his face, from his forehead to his cheeks, to his lips and jaw and neck, my hands on his chest feeling how his heart started to beat faster, as I unbuttoned his shirt slowly while I kissed and nibble on the skin of his neck, I felt his hands go from my back to my hips, pushing them down into his own, making me feel the consequences that my touch had on him, a moan fell out of my mouth as his hands squeezed my ass and pushed me slightly forward towards him.

As I started to undo the bandages from his neck and chest, my hips unconsciously started to move and I heard him groan in my ears as he pushed my hips down and took control of the movement encouraging it.

"Take your shirt off" He whispered to me in a breathy voice.

"Ask nicely" I said in a seductive voice and he looked at me in shock and excitement. I could see him thinking as I was putting up a fight for control of the situation.