quicksand (Dazai X Reader)

Switzerland

Dazai has been acting weird since the situation happened, he has been following everywhere like a lost kitten or dog. If I move from the bedroom to the living room, I hear his footsteps following me. If I am cooking something he is sitting on the counter looking at me. If I am reading a book by the window he is making drawings on a sketching book by the sofa. He is always there, looking at me with sad puppy eyes as if he thought the moment he left me alone I would disappear.

I was on the bathtub while Dazai was sitting on the floor drawing something, he never let me see his drawings, or the things he wrote on his little books, and I respected his privacy, but the curiosity in me grew everyday.

"You have been acting weird" I said while resting my head on the edge of the tub and closing my eyes. He just hummed in response.

"I won't disappear you know, you don't have to follow me everywhere" I added, trying to incite some kind of response out of him.

"Well, I am sorry if I want to spend time with you" He answered annoyedly, I heard the pencil get dragged hard on the paper.

"That's not what I mean and you know it, it was not your fault, everyone did what they could and I am back home safely, even the baby girl got back to her real mom, everybody won, why do you keep beating yourself about it?" I asked opening my eyes to look at him. He had his hair slicked back and slightly wet from the humidity of the room, he was only wearing pants and the bandages around his body, a little frown on his face as he bit his lip unconsciously.

I liked looking at Dazai, he is not only nice to look at because of his handsome features, but his small quirks are interesting too, specially when he gets comfortable, the little movements he did with his hands, how he sometimes took a strand of his hair between two fingers and rubbed it to feel the texture on his fingertips in a reassuring motion, how he whistled different tunes when looking through the window when he feels anxious. He is a weird man.

"I should have found you sooner" He said, his eyes on the paper that was getting soggy from the steam.

"You found me in like three days, it's fine, it was a difficult case" my voice was a soft whisper.

"Plus, it wasn't so bad, I can't say I suffered, the conversations were interesting" I said as my hands played with the water that filled the tub, and he turned his gaze to me.

"What did you tell him" his tone demanding, almost commanding and cold, he seemed to catch himself as he whispered a soft 'sorry' and turned his eyes back to whatever he was doing on the sketching book.

"I did not give him information if that's what you are worried about, I kept our conversations on neutral grounds, we talked about good and bad, morality, religion, things like that... he reminded me of you in a way" I said looking at the ceiling but I saw him scrunch his nose from the corner of my eye.

"But I definitely like you better" I said confidently, I really mean it, the matryoshka might have been a nice person to have a conversation while being locked up, but I would choose to be with Dazai in all freedom, he just smiled softly like a kid and kept on dragging the pencil on the white paper.

"Everyone's coming to visit today, can't keep them at bay anymore" He told me as he reached for my hand and took it, wetting his bandages, a thing he did not seem to mind.

"Also, I told them about us so there's that, they will ask a lot of questions and I will send the wolves to you, there is nothing you can do about it but accept your demise as I hide in the kitchen or something" He said with a mischievous look on his face, eyes gleaming with childish joy, as if he had won on monopoly, I just groaned and sank myself in the tub and I heard him giggle.