quicksand (Dazai X Reader)

underworld

Tw: smut

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Dazai slept the whole flight. Eleven hours he had his eyes closed and was curled up in an uncomfortable position without looking bothered at all. I slept on and off during the flight. My legs and back hurt from trying not to move that much because at some point in our slumber, Dazai had grabbed my hand and hugged it as if it was a life line. 

“Hey, wake up Osamu, we are here” I whispered softly into his hair trying to wake up slowly. One thing he never has told me about was why he sometimes woke up terrified, not because he has had a bad dream, he has a lot of those, but sometimes, the mere action of being woken up scared him a little. He would open his eyes quickly and sit down in the bed, looking around as if to make sure someone isn't there. 

There are a lot of things that I don't know about him. 

“Five minutes more” He mumbled and kissed the hand he held hostage and close to him. His lips felt unusually warm against the back of my hand. Guess these are unusual times. 

I didn't respond after that. Dazai stayed in the fetal position he was in for all the flight, even when the stewardess asked him to sit back up for the descened, he decided he would not follow orders and just keep his head on my lap. 

My bruised eye felt heavy. I guess his did too. 

Once again we didn't talk much coming out of the plane. The bag on his shoulder, his hand on mine with fingers intertwined, and the warm and dirty air from LA making our hair smell like smoke. 

It felt like a lucid dream. It was both haunting and beautiful, the kind of nightmare where you don't want to wake up even though shivers make your limbs tremble because you just got to know where the plot leads you. 

Walking, getting in the taxi, listening to some generic pop music, looking outside the window, city lights reflected in the dark of our eyes. I wanted for everything to end, and to all to stay the same. 

Dazai squeezed my hand three times and then a fourth exactly twelve minutes later. I didn't know the meaning of it at the time, but a meaning it must have. 

The detective motioned the taxi driver to stop and we did, he paid and I stayed on the sidewalk, watching the people come and go. Busy streets despite it being like one in the morning. LA is a city that never rests, full of unachievable dreams and false hopes. Such a perfect place for two misfits who have never felt at home. 

“We should get something to eat, why don't you go and buy something while I answer the 134 missed calls from Kunikida?” Dazai said as he gave me some money along with a kiss at the top of my head, and then he disappeared into the sea of people. 

I entered a fast food restaurant and did as I was told, as I always do. Ignored the stares that only looked at the purple of my eye and the cut on my eyebrow. Waited for the food, grabbed the paper bag and sat on a bench outside, waiting and waiting, like I am expected to do. 

“What you buy?” His voice I could recognize anywhere, soft and airy, yet deep and strong. The kind of voice that makes you want to listen to it forever, even if it only whispered lies. 

“Nuggets” Can't believe it was one of the first words I said that day. 

“Interesting choice, I'll take it” He said while he sat beside me. The closeness made me recognize a certain smell.