Chasing the Clouds || H.S. [ONGOING]

Sixty

"Every time I reach for you you slip
Through my fingers into cold sunlight,
Laughing at the things that I had planned.
The map of my world gets smaller as I sit here
Pulling at the loose threads now.
We're tumbling down. We're spiralling."

Song: Spiralling — Keane

++++++

𝓢𝓮𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 𝟐𝟎𝟏𝟏

Andie pretty much kept to herself at school the next day. She had never been a depressed person, but after she spent the night worrying herself to sleep, it was all she felt.

She really wanted to talk to Harry, but she didn't think she had it in her. On the other hand, she knew she needed to talk to Zayn to get everything out in the open. He deserved to know the truth.

"Um, hi," Andie said, walking up to Zayn at his locker after second period. She was anxious, but she knew she just needed to suck it up.

"Oh, hey," Zayn said, a wide smile forming on his face the second he saw her.

"Can we talk again... somewhere more private? Like, maybe after school or something?" She asked hesitantly.

"Yeah. Yeah, definitely," he said, watching her carefully.

"Okay."

"Okay."

"Uh, I have to get to class, but I'll... I'll see you," she told him.

"Yeah. Alright," he said, sending her a half-smile.

"Bye," she said with a little wave, feeling completely awkward.

"Bye, Andie," he said just before she walked away.

She felt apprehensive for the rest of the day. Being around both Zayn and Harry at lunch caused her anxiety to skyrocket to the point where she asked Janessa to go with her to the bathroom.

"Okay. What is going on? I feel like I haven't seen you in days. And then you and Zayn drop a bomb on all of us when you somehow end up knowing each other, even though he's been gone all freakin' summer," Janessa said as Andie quickly pushed open all the stall doors to make sure they were totally alone in the bathroom.

"What is going on with you?" Janessa laughed. Andie took a deep breath and let it out hard.

"What? Is Zayn some internet boyfriend or something? This is so bizarre," Janessa laughed.

Andie shook her head 'no', but looked at her with a culpable expression. It wasn't exactly like that, but it was in the same realm of possibility at least.

"What is going on?" Janessa laughed.

"I lost my virginity to him," Andie confessed quietly.

"What!?" Janessa screeched and Andie cringed noticeably before shushing her.

"It was two years ago when I was here and I met him at camp and he was... I don't know... he's a complete babe and... and he wanted to hang out with me and we got drunk and... and it just happened. But then he got kicked out of camp the next day because he stole the alcohol from the head counselor's office and I-I never saw him again... until yesterday," Andie explained in one long stammering breath.

"Oh. My. God," Janessa said slowly, her eyes nearly bulging out of her head as she stared at Andie, like she was having some sort of eureka! moment.

"What?" Andie asked impatiently.

"You're the girl!" She said quickly.

"What girl?" Andie asked incredulously.

"Zayn told Louis about a girl at camp that he liked, that he lost his virginity to before getting kicked out," Janessa explained. Andie's eyes went wide as she felt her heart restrict painfully.

"Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god," Andie groaned, quickly pressing her hands against the sides of her face before she started to pace in small circles, feeling the warning signs of a panic attack coming on.

"I don't think Louis actually believed him. Wow, this is so crazy," Janessa laughed.

"He was a virgin?" Andie whined, pulling her hands away from her face to look at her friend.

"Apparently. I don't know why a guy would lie about that," Janessa said, shrugging her shoulders.

The panic was setting in. The fact that he was a virgin meant their time together actually meant something to him too. Like, she wasn't just some conquest. She wasn't just the next girl in line. She was the first girl. Oh, god.

"I can't believe this. Have you talked to Harry about it?" Janessa said through a chuckle and Andie nodded.

"Well?"

"Oh my god. It was awful," Andie whined.

"What did he say?" Janessa asked, her expression perking up curiously.

"I mean, he was really calm. Like he didn't get mad or anything. But honestly I think this is going to fuck everything up. It's going to erase all the progress I've made with him. God dammit," Andie groaned.

"Do you really think so?" Janessa asked.

"I lost my virginity to his best friend!" Andie shouted just as a couple of girls walked into the bathroom, looking taken aback before giggling at Andie.

"God dammit," Andie grumbled under her breath. She was going to get a reputation now — one she absolutely did not want or deserve.

"I've got to get to class," Andie mumbled to Janessa.

"We're gonna talk later," Janessa told her firmly.

"Uh, I'm meeting Zayn after school," Andie said as quietly as she could so the stream of girls, who were now filing into the bathroom due to lunch being over, couldn't hear.

"Oh?" Janessa questioned, heightening her eyebrows.

"I have to tell him about Harry before he finds out from someone else," she said quietly.

"Ah, okay," Janessa said, nodding her head.

"I've gotta... I've gotta go," Andie told her again before she made her way out of the bathroom.

When she turned the corner to go to her locker, she nearly ran into Zayn.

"Hey," he greeted, sending her a sideways smirk.

"Uh, hey," she said, trying not to let her mood translate through her tone.

Then she remembered why her mood had shifted so suddenly and she felt extremely awkward being so close to him after just finding out that they mutually lost their virginities to one another.

"I'll see you after school, yeah?" He asked, still smirking at her.

"Y-yeah. For sure. Yeah," she stammered, felling like a fucking dope in his presence.

"Alright. I'll see you," he said with a light chuckle before they walked away from each other.

Andie let out a breath and continued on toward her locker.