Matthew Espinosa Imagines

Always

Not an imagine. Just explains how I really feel on the inside...

I remember years ago, someone told me to take caution when it comes to love. But then I found him, I was careless and I forgot. He taught me how to let loose and how to be myself. He taught me how to be happy.

But the thing is, he doesn't even know I exist. It hurts. It hurts looking at him. I crave his love so much that it physically hurts me. When I see picture or videos of him, my stomach starts to ache and my eyes become blurry. Reality is that, he will never love me back, and that makes me weaker than anything in this planet. But every time I see his face, I still smile. And that's a lot for someone as broken as I am.

I would do anything to be the reason he smiles, to be the first thing he thinks of when he wakes up. I would do anything to not be a fan in his eyes. Anything.

I've spent hours and hours memorizing every little thing about this boy, who will never know my name. And sometimes all I can really do is cry, because I'll never be his and he'll never be mine.

Loving someone who doesn't love you back is like hugging a cactus, the tighter you hold on, the more it hurts.

But through all this pain, Matt has taught me how to survive and how to keep smiling no matter what. I will forever love this boy, because he's keeping me alive and he is the best thing to ever happen to me.