Carole - Now Complete!

Part 18- Answers.

Carole sat with her head in her hands and sobbed. 

"Carole, love," Poor Ritchie was horrified, "What's so bad that you won't marry me? Please - I don't care what it is...I love you and nothing you do would change that."

Carole shook her head and sobbed even more.

Ritchie put his arm across her shoulders. "It doesn't mater what it is Carole." He waited. "Have you been unfaithful to me?" he asked gently, "Is that what's wrong?"

"NO! NO RITCHIE!" She looked up. Her face pale and distraught. "I'D NEVER DO ANYTHING LIKE THAT TO ANYONE, LET ALONE YOU!" She wiped away her tears and grabbed his hand, "I love you...I always have...YOU and only YOU Richard Starkey! You have to believe that!"

"I do believe you," he said softly, kissing  her lips, "So tell me what is so bad you can't marry me? Please Carole." He held her face, tears in his eyes. "Tell me."

She nodded. Kissing his hands, she moved them from her face. 

"When Julian came to stay...it was lovely. We both enjoyed it, I know that."

Ritchie nodded.

"Then you talked about you and me getting married. I was blown away Ritchie! I'd love to be your wife." She paused, smiling at him.

"Then why...?"

"Shhh." She held her finger to his lips.

"You've told me how much you want a family. I saw your excitement when you thought I was pregnant. You were over the moon!"

Ritchie smiled at her. "I was excited but one day, that excitement will be because we're having our own  baby! We  can still get married!"

Carole shook her head slowly. "If you marry me Ritchie then you'll never know the excitement of waiting for your child to be born."

Ritchie stared at her. Moments passed.  "I don't understand Carole."

"When I was with Bobby, by the time the violence got really bad, I was six months pregnant." She looked to see his reaction, "I lost my baby when he kicked me repeatedly in the stomach. It wasn't an ordinary miscarriage Ritchie.£

"I ...I didn't ...I didn't know that my love."

Carole gave him a sad smile. I've never told anyone except you before...and the hospital of course."

He nodded.

"I went to see the doctor whilst you were away because after my baby was born, I had serious problems. I started bleeding heavily. They couldn't stop it and there was a high risk I could die. Anyway, they took me to an operating theatre and did whatever they could to stop the bleeding. Clearly they did as I'm still here but..."

"But what?"

"When I was discharged from hospital, I had a very vague memory of something the doctor said to me. I'd completely forgotten about it to be honest. I wasn't hiding anything from you! You have to remember that I was so traumatised by events as well as being physically unwell!!! When I returned home, Bobby had deserted me. I had no money, nothing until Paul stepped in. Then I met you." She smiled. "The best thing that ever happened in my life."

Ritchie smiled and kissed her hand. "But Carole, what did the doctor say to upset you?"

"The operation I had when I was bleeding saved my life...but it meant that I sustained some internal scarring."

"Scars don't change things Carole." 

"They do Ritchie. The scars, they are the very reason why I can't marry you."

"Why? I..."

"The scarring means that I can't have anymore children Ritchie. Because of the damage, I'll never conceive." Tears began to fall once again, "You want a family so much Ritchie! And you are a wonderful, kind talented man who deserves that. But as much as I wish I could be the person who shares that joy with you, but I know  I can't. I can't have children."

"That's what the doctor told you?"

She nodded.

"She could be wrong!" He said hopefully, "There might be some different tests or treatment they could do?"

Carole shook her head. "I asked Ritchie. I begged for anything possible but..." she shrugged. "I've been told that some women with my problem can sometimes conceive but they can't carry a child full term. I couldn't do that to you Ritchie...say there's a baby then loose it." She  began to cry. "I'm so very very sorry!"

She sobbed once more, head in hands. Ritchie pulled her into a hug and lay her down on the bed once more. They stayed curled up together, both crying for the loss of the future they would no longer share.