Climbing Up Out Of The Ashes

Invisible Knotting

I THOUGHT IF I SAID WHAT I COULDN'T DO THEN IT WOULD HAPPEN.

yet i tried to tie a hundred thousand stranded knots to get the kinks out.

WITH THE FEELING OF MAYBE THIS TIME IT WON'T PULL SO TIGHT, MAYBE I CAN GET OUT.

i'll say it so it will be.

I SAID IT TO THE SAND IN MY EARS, SHOUTING SO LOUD, IT BLEW OUT THE GRAINS LIKE FIREWORKS.

i danced to a new rhythm called being wrong.

I LAUGHED AT MY FOOLISH WANTS, THAT YOU WERE NOT THE ONE TO BE MY ONE.

yet in the end i prolonged the one thing i had wanted never to become.

THE FOOLISH, GNARLING WILD ANIMAL, RABID MEATY FLESH HUNGERING FOR HEARTBEATS.

you were the star of my dreams.

JADED HEROINE OF NOTHING WORTH PINING OVER.

i did grow pine cones the size of elephants in the jungle.

they had a trunk on them as big as a comet, bright enough to light a land of barren goods.

FAST ENOUGH TO LEAVE IT HUNGRY FOR SPARKLING HAZES OF MAGIC,

THAT IS WHAT IT IS, A SPELL OF MAGIC I CAN'T ESCAPE FROM.

untying the knots that are only visible to me.

I see every tied up strand that only gets tighter by the pulling of my very own hands.