Chapter 22

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Transparent hands were at my neck // Oh but I love the way you let me breathe instead

"You... you l-love me?" Taehyung stuttered.

Jeongguk was messing with him right?

"Yes." The younger replied. "Like in the whole I'm in love with you thing."

Taehyung could feel his eyes widening at that and his cheeks getting even warmer. Jeongguk's hand was still on his shoulder and suddenly that simple touch seemed to be burning his skin. "The whole I'm in love with you thing?"

Did he mean what Taehyung was thinking with that?

"Exactly. With all of those things you're thinking about cause I know what is going in your mind. I want to hold you and I want to kiss you and all of that." Jeongguk said.

Oh yes he definitely meant what Taehyung was thinking with that. Fuck.

"But I'm messed up." The older said. It seemed to be the only rational thing to say because that angel of a boy couldn't be in love with someone like Taehyung.

That just didn't make any sense, especially the fact that Jeongguk had said it after Taehyung confessed to him his mental state. Jeongguk just couldn't be in love with someone as messed up as Taehyung is.

"Maybe in your eyes." Jeongguk said with a shrug. "In my perspective you're just going through some hard times, but you're sweet, funny, very weird but very lovable as well."

Was that even happening for real? Wasn't Taehyung dreaming with this or something?

So Jimin really meant when he said Hoseok told him that Jeongguk 'had the hots' for him.

Oh my God.

What was he supposed to say now? That he loves him too? But does he? Love is such a strong word and Taehyung isn't even sure how it is being in love because he never experienced it before but if he has to think about it, it would sure feel a lot like what he feels for Jeongguk, he supposes.

It also seemed very illogical and simply wrong to not tell Jeongguk he loved him because who wouldn't love that boy? Because Taehyung's heart ached in the most pleasing way whenever Jeongguk was around him. Because Jeongguk was the person who made him finally feel safe. Because the boy's presence would be more than enough to make Taehyung feel happy and at peace.

Yes maybe it was hard enough admitting he liked Jeongguk to Jimin and to anyone else, even himself, but maybe it wasn't hard to admit that he loved Jeongguk for the boy himself because something inside Taehyung was screaming at him that he just needed to say it, that Jeongguk was worth it and that he deserved to know he was loved.

Once Taehyung went to Jeongguk's apartment he wasn't sure how he felt, but after seeing how Jeongguk reacted to him opening up about his mental health something clicked inside of him, because if that precious boy confessed his feelings after that shit show then maybe he actually loved Taehyung. And if he loved Taehyung as messed up as he is then Taehyung definitely loved him back.

Taehyung was a big fan of the Troye Sivan's phrase you don't have to say I love you, to say I love you because he wasn't fond of expressing his feelings so he hopes his actions could speak for him but that was Jeon Jeongguk saying he was in love with him so you know.... fuck all of that.

"I don't even know what to say." He started nervously. "I guess I should start with fuck then say that... that I'm in love with you too because holy shit Kookie I really am."

Jeongguk smiled so brightly at that, Taehyung thought he would be blinded by it.

"I'm really glad to hear that." The younger replied.

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