Chapter 38

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It's cold when we're apart and I hate to feel this die // But you can't give me what I want // Just give it time

a/n: Before I start I just wanna say I'll share some really personal information about my mom and it involves cancer and treatment and it gets real sad so I just wanna let you guys know in case you can be triggered by it as it happens to me <3

Taehyung knew the view from his balcony was no joke, as his apartment was in a high point of the city and he lived high up on the floors, he could see the vast majority of the city from there. He could see the sun setting every day and also it rising up every morning.

It was a breathtaking view and Taehyung smiled at Jeongguk's face once the younger stepped on the balcony and widened his eyes and his mouth.

His boyfriend walked closer to the grade of the balcony and let out a loud "wow".

"Pretty nice right?" Taehyung asked, walked closing to the younger and leaning on the metal grade.

"Really fucking nice... you can see everything from here."

"Yeah..." The older looked over at his boyfriend beside him. "But as I am really high up, when it winds here, the wind is no joke. It's terrifying."

Jeongguk stopped looking at the view and turned to Taehyung. "It must have sucked for you..."

His voice sounded concerned again and Taehyung wanted to kick himself, can't he make his boyfriend stop sounding like that all the time? Why is Taehyung so goddamn whining?
"It did, but never mind that now. Gladly I don't live here anymore."

The younger gave him a small smile, picked Taehyung's right hand on his and started to play with his ring.

The older felt some strange feeling on his stomach at that sight. It was odd but it felt so good and he beamed at Jeongguk.

"So what's the story behind this? You were so anxious after noticing you have forgotten your ring over here, it must mean a lot to you." The younger said.

Taehyung nodded. "It does. Only Jimin knows about this, I haven't told neither my father nor my sister about it...." He took a breath before saying it. "It belonged to my mom."

The younger instantly stopped playing with the ring and widened his eyes. That would always be his reaction when Taehyung mentioned his mother, it would always catch his boyfriend off guard because the older never talked about her.

He never talked about her to anyone, because even though so long has passed, it still hurts too badly. Taehyung always figured he was better if he ignored it, not pretending she hadn't died or anything, just pretending that he wasn't missing her so badly very single day. It was easier like this.

But sometimes the time to talk about her would come and even though he wanted to avoid it at all costs, he knew he should tell some things about that to Jeongguk. And weirdly enough, considering how much he avoids this, he wanted to tell some things to Jeongguk. He wanted to finally let some of his feelings and thoughts out because he kept them in for so goddamn long.

As he knew the younger wasn't going to say a thing, he began to ramble it all out.

"I didn't use to wear it as I do now. Some years ago my father was cleaning up his wardrobe and found two boxes of jewelry there... I don't know why he kept them as I know he gave away all of my mom's stuff several years ago. But he did and he was going to give it away too."

"I saw him going towards my sister's bedroom with it, probably to ask if she wanted, because it was women's jewelry and you know how parents are with those stupid gender roles..." Taehyung grumbled, annoyed. "But I stopped him before he could and told him I wanted those. Thankfully he didn't question it and gave the boxes to me."

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