Route 44

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I was the one who drove Eos home. He was so exhausted. Buong biyahe ay nakasandal lamang siya sa upuan, his arm covering his eyes.

Punong puno naman ako ng pag-aalala. I don't know if I can leave him at this state. In the end, I decided to lie to my parents. Telling them that I'll be home late or I might just sleep at Keana's or Eula's. I even texted the two to cover up for me.

Hindi naman natigil sa pagreceive ng messages ang phone ko. Hindi ko na muna iyon pinansin at ibinigay ang lahat ng atensiyon kay Eos.

"Eos, we're here." Sabi ko habang tinatantiya siya. He sighed.

"I'll take you home." Wala nitong lakas na sabi. He looked at me at hindi ko maiwasan ang hindi maawa sa kanya nang magtama ang aming mga mata.

"Huwag mo nang isipin 'yan." Sabi ko sa kanya. Pinatay ko ang engine at kinalas na ang aking seatbelt. "I'll stay with you."

Halatang nagulat siya sa aking sinabi. But he still managed to smile.

"Thank you."

Nagluto ako ng dinner naming dalawa. Sinabihan ko siyang magshower muna para mahimasmasan at magpahinga muna sa kanyang kwarto na sinunod naman niya ng tahimik.

I ache for Eos. The pain that I saw in him earlier pierced right through me.

He's been in so much pain and he's been keeping it to himself the whole time. Kaya hindi ko rin siya masisi kung bigla na lamang siyang sumabog kanina.

Maybe what he saw in the graduation triggered it. Hindi ko maiwasan ang makaramdam din ng galit sa kanyang ama.

How could he still meet with his wife and come up on that stage after?

Naiintindihan ko na rin kung bakit ayaw magpakita ni Eos kay Tita Ellaine. He doesn't want to take her happiness away from her. Maybe he was afraid that the words might just slip off his mouth because of too much anger. That will surely break Tita Ellaine.

She's too nice. She doesn't deserve that.

But I can't also digest the fact that she fell in love with a married man! I don't want to judge her but... how painful was that?

Nang matapos magluto ay pumunta na ako sa kwarto ni Eos. I knocked before twisting the knob. He was sitting on the egde of the bed, his elbows resting on top of his knees. Sapo-sapo nito ang mukha sa kanyang mga palad.

I walked towards him. I calculated every movement that I made. Nang makalapit ako ay kinuha ko ang kamay nito. He then looked up at me with those tired gray orbs of his. Its color became darker maybe because of the pain he's feeling.

Hindi ko alam ang pinagdadaanan ni Eos ngayon. He was always composed. Alam na alam niya kung paano hawakan ang kanyang emosiyon but that changed when his father came in to the picture.

Napakalaki ng epekto nito sa buong pagkatao niya. Para siyang nayanig.

"I cooked dinner. Let's go?" I softly spoke. He stared at me. Binigyan ko siya ng tipid na ngiti. I slightly squeezed his hand, too.

Marahan ako nitong hinatak palapit sa kanya hanggang sa mapaupo ako sa kanyang hita. Hindi naman ako tumutol. My legs settled on the middle of his thighs. His arms slowly snaked around my waist, pulling me closer to his body. He then buried his face on the nook of my neck.

"I'm sorry for earlier." He murmured. "I just... lost it."

"It's okay." I caressed his hair. "I understand..."

Lalong humigpit ang yakap nito sa akin. We were silent until he spoke.

"He abandoned us, Empress. I grew up without him. I was so young back then. Hindi ko naiintindihan kung bakit galit si abuelo at abuela sa kanya. All I know is that I miss my father even if I never really saw him. At night, I always hear Mamà cry. I thought that she just misses him like I do that I even cry with her sometimes."

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