Don't Say Goodbye

Chapter 12:

Madison's POV

We enter my apartment walking upstairs I sit on my bed waiting for Cody to come back from the bathroom. He soon comes back with the first aid kit opening it on the empty bed pulling out cotton balls and alcohol, pouring some alcohol on the cotton ball then holding it to my bruise he created.

"I ruined your beautiful face." He chokes on his words swallowing hard. "Madison I'm not right for you, I keep hurting you I don't think this can last long."

My heart can't take this he can't leave me when he just got back into my life making it clearer then it once was. "Don't say things like that." I hiss at the pain that creates on my head from the stings of the alcohol tears streaming down my face making it worse. I want him to stay I don't want him to leave me I feel complete with him in my life again. How can he even think about letting go of me as if all the things we've been through can be passed aside.

"But it's true." He releases the cotton ball from my face putting a bandage around my forehead and lightly kissing it. "I love you to much that I have to let you go." He wipes a tear from my cheek weakly smiling at me, making my lips quiver.

"Can we not talk about this please." I clench at my heart hoping he will get the message of how I feel inside, he just nods shifting his weight on his right side sliding his hands on his pockets.

"You hungry?" He questions looking anywhere but at me finding interest in a family portrait. Now that he mentions it I am starving I hadn't ate all day I regret not eating breakfast, I nod not wanting to speak with the pounding going through my head and all.

"Ok, I'll make something to eat, you get cleaned up." His face has no expression when he finally looks me in the eye then glances away walking downstairs, I let out a heavy sigh I didn't even know I was holding. I lift myself up digging through my dresser for a tank top and shorts to slip on before heading to the bathroom and turning the shower on and stripping out of my clothes.

I walk into the shower feeling the hot water hit my body making my head throb more, I do my best to wash myself all I can before my head tells me it's time to get out. I wash one last time along with my hair taking all the knots and tangles out then stepping out the shower. Slipping on my blue tank top and green shorts. Cody and his mood swings are really getting to me one minute he cares and the next his just cold with no expression I just want to know what's running through his mind.

I get out of the bathroom with my dirty clothes in my hand carrying them to the laundry room and dropping them in a basket. I hear Cody whistle in the kitchen as I step quietly to the kitchen just watching him. I wonder how he's feeling is he still cold still heartless maybe his old self didn't go away as much as I thought it did, but I did tell him I didn't want him to change.

"Something smells good." I sniff in the delicious smell coming from the stove making my feet walk beside Cody trying to get a better smell. "What ya cooking." I ask poking on his shoulder he doesn't answer he just continues cooking his muscles tensing up from my fingertips, I frown why does he block me out all the time why must he be to himself a lot. I step between Cody and the stove, turning the stove off and turning to him. I raise my hand to cup his cheek leaning in for a kiss.

"Don't." He utters coldly at me creating space between us.

"I'm still mad at you." He slaps my hand away my heart aches a little.

"Cody." I chew on my lip hard tasting the blood. "Please talk to me about it." I reach for his hand intertwining it into mine lightly putting it to my cheek. "Let's talk about this, we can make it through we always do." His eyes turned soft for a second before turning back cold his once parted lips back in a straight thin line.

"I hate when you do this." My voice raises as I throw away his hand my hands turning into fist. "You're hot then you're cold, and look like I mean nothing to you." The confidence I once had us gone, my voice cracks making a hoarse sound.

"Maybe because you don't mean nothing to me." My heart drops I look up at him watching the words leave his lips, his expression unreadable. He grips my wrist and bitterly laughs.

"What you going to do now princess, you going to cry?" He fake pouts at me, I'm not going to cry his not going to make me weak and vulnerable any longer.

"Awe you're crying like the little bitch you are." He slaps my tears away from face that u didn't know fell down.

"Why are you acting so cold to me all the sudden." His making me feel so worthless like I mean nothing in this world like he can step all over me. "You need to learn that everything isn't always going to be okay!" He slams his fist on the counter, a whole the shape of his knuckles mark the counter.

"I know that, that's why I'm in love with a mistake." He leaves his eyes from the counter to look at me. "I want to be a mistake with you Cody, but you must come clean."

He just walks away from me leaving me alone like before, I crush my head to the wall inhaling and coughing up tears. Why do I love him so much when all he does is tear me down.