wedding buddies ↠ harry styles ✓

TEN

Carrington Hill

Harry had taken me to a restaurant a bit away from the place we were staying at but still beautiful as ever. The table we got was close to the side where you could see the sea and the sunset as it hid behind the stunning mountains. Each table was on its own; a few feet between each guest gave enough privacy for everyone to be able to enjoy a nice dinner with their families and loved ones.

Harry and I decided to sit on the couch which was on one side of the table while two chairs were on the other. I thought it was really cute how it was positioned because it allowed the guests to enjoy the sunset while eating comfortably. The service was good as well in my opinion as once we knew what we wanted, the waitress came over to ask us about it then in about five to ten minutes we had our food on the table.

We have probably covered every single subject there was to get to know the other person better but even when it felt like there was nothing to talk about, something came up out of nowhere. Our current topic was tattoos since both of us were into them.

"I got my first tattoo when I turned eighteen as a birthday present," he told me between bites. Harry tried to keep the conversation going because I was just stuffing my face like I hadn't eaten all day.

Truth to be told, I had food all day and I was starting to feel fat with not doing dance for a few days now. But oh well, I'll work it off when I get back home. I'm on holiday; I can afford to eat whatever my heart desires.

"I was eighteen too, was about to turn nineteen in that November," I said once I swallowed the food I was chewing then took a sip of my drink. "What did you get?" I asked him as I turned towards him a bit, my leg was pulled up and went under my other one which was just hanging down from the seat.

This date was really chill, causal and laid back. I loved it because I felt like we were just hanging out like we did every day and it wasn't too serious, forced or awkward.

"It was an outline of a star on the inside of my bicep," he told me. "Later on I got it filled in because I thought why not."

"Does it not stop you when you have photoshoots to do and stuff? When you walk during a fashion show or something?"

"I usually get it covered up with this tattoo foundation by the makeup artist on set so it's never really a problem," I nodded once he gave me an answer and I couldn't believe I hadn't clocked on. It was obvious that those things exist; I had to cover my tattoos before as well. "What was your first tattoo?"

"It was this one," I said as I ran my finger over the black ink that said 'self love' on my wrist in a fancy writing. "I got it because it just represents what I'm about and it means so much to me as well. I was lacking self love during my teenage years and even before, never thinking I was good enough and all that stuff that goes through everyone's minds. I think it's important to encourage women and men to love themselves no matter what shape, colour or size they are. All of that makes them who they are and that's worth so much. Like I said before I struggled with loving myself but now I've learnt it, to be honest, still on the journey of learning to really love who I am. This tattoo is here to remind me I'm worth it and I'm beautiful the way I am and I'm the best being me," my voice got quieter and quieter as I went on a rant about my tattoo, last night's events when I almost broke down in front of Harry asking him if he really wanted to be with me made me shake my head in my mind.

I was putting myself down when I worked so hard on getting myself where I was before I got to know him. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't putting blame on him, I just found myself being the way I was before and I didn't like that.

In that moment when I explained to Harry what my tattoo means to me, the whole situation had been put into a new perspective.

"You good?" he asked me when I didn't look up at him but kept staring at my leg where my stretch marks were slightly visible considering they peaked out of my shorts. I took a deep breath as I lifted my head up, my vision was a tiny bit blurry and soon enough I found myself between my date's arms. "It's all good, Carrington," he cooed with a soft voice, his hand running up and down my uncovered arm as he caressed my skin.