Lachlan's P.O.V.
I flinched as Rob yelled at me, his loud voice scaring me when he screamed. I covered my ears with hands and desperately hoped he'd leave me alone. I was at my worst, terrified and almost in tears when he started to yell. I was well aware I had screwed up but he didn't need to make any more out of it than he needed too.
Earlier he had asked me to go out shopping for some food because we didn't have any left in the house, but I had gotten caught up in editing videos and didn't have time to go.
It was bad enough trying to keep up my YouTube channel when I had to do other stuff as well, but we were going away in a few days and I just didn't have any time to do it.
I was curled up in my desk chair, feet pulled off the ground and my face buried in my knees. There were tears streaming down my face and to be honest I was terrified. Rob was scary when he was mad.
I heard his feet stomp up the stairs towards my room and I froze, my arms shaking. The door opened and in my mirror I could see Rob's silhouette in the darkened hallway, his hands clenched in fists.
He stormed into my room, pushing his face right up close to mine before he really started.
"I gave you one job Lachlan! One job and you didn't do it!" I nodded, my back pressed into the chair as far as it would go.
"How could you forget! I told you this morning you needed to get food and you didn't! How could you be so stupid!"
A muffled sob caught in my throat and I covered my head with hands, scared of being hit.
I had previously been in an abusive relationship, and the effects had never really left me so I always covered my head or flinched when someone raised their voice. Rob did his best to be supportive but sometimes he forgot and I got so scared.
I know he never meant to make me scared, but sometimes it just ended up like that and I had to bear through it until he realised what he was doing.
He raised his hand, moving it back and I screamed, bolting out of the chair and into my room, locking the door behind me. I fell into the corner, the one furthest away from the door and sobbed, all the memories coming back.
There was banging on the door and I flinched again, the nights of locking myself away all becoming too clear.
The bruises would stay on my skin for weeks after those nights and I had to use make-up to cover the ones on my face, but unfortunately I wasn't clever enough. I had been out with Billy and Jay recording a Pokémon video and Billy had picked me up, my shirt falling up and exposing my stomach.
I had tried to hide it but Jay had already seen the purple and blue bruises covering my chest and back. I had collapsed and I told them everything, from the first day he hit me until then. They had stolen all my things out of the house when my partner had been out and I moved in with Jay, until Rob offered for me to move in with him.
Back in the present, Rob was slamming his fists on the door, scaring me more than it was doing good.
"Lachlan? Lachlan please!" His voice was pleading with me desperately, but it was a tactic often used by my previous partner so ignored him. Wrapping my arms around myself I sobbed until I couldn't see, my eyes blurred with tears. I was shaking like a leaf, screams of terror trapped in my throat like monsters. They were monsters. Demons in fact.
My vision was fading fast and I could still hear Rob pounding on the door, still pleading, still calling out my name. Black swam before my eyes before I let out one desperate scream and then nothing.
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The first thing I felt was warmth, I was surrounded by it. There was a warm blanket wrapped around me, and I could hear a fire crackling near me. There was uneven breathing too, someone who had been crying and someone who was still crying. They started to talk.
"I know, he passed out... I'm so scared, I didn't mean it! I'm worried he won't trust me anymore... He was crying, he was crying because of me.... I forgot, I forgot and I screwed up so badly! How did I not see he was so scared!... He's still passed out, I moved him to the couch about 20 minutes ago... I'll call you back later... Yeah... Bye..."
There was silence for a few second and I felt a hand in my hair, making me flinch by habit. A quiet voice echoed in my ears.
"Lachlan?" I whimpered almost silently and the hand removed itself, cautiously returning to my shoulder. I wanted so badly to lash out and run away again, but I knew from the past it would only get me hurt.
I knew Rob was different, he would never try and hit me but there was always a chance he could, and I tried to defend myself against that chance as much as possible.
I moved the blanket so it covered my head, a defensive strategy for me. It hid me, even if it was obvious. The hand was still there and I knew the owner of the hand could feel me shaking, trembling.
Rob's P.O.V.
I could feel the younger boy shaking like a leaf underneath the blankets, his head hidden from my view. After he had screamed I had run and got a screwdriver, taking the door of its hinges to get to him.
He had been passed out for almost half an hour at that point and I was so scared he wouldn't trust me again. After he first moved in with me he couldn't be in the same room as me and any fast movements made him flinch so much he almost cried.
He took almost 6 months off YouTube to recover but the fans were very supportive of him and if anything, he gained subscribers while he was away.
Over the months he slowly improved, therapy helping so much but raised voices still reduced him to tears. I really didn't mean to scare him, I was just so mad I forgot about it.
I called Vikk after a while, he was the sensible and could probably tell me what to do. He talked me through what to do when Lachlan woke up, having done it himself with Lachlan before. Lachlan had gone and stayed with Vikk for a week in the Sidemen house and Harry had arrived to see him and yelled so loud that he scared Lachlan into Vikk's room and he wouldn't come out. It had taken almost 2 hours of coaxing to get him out again, and Harry was so apologetic afterwards, careful to never yell again while Lachlan was in the house.
He really struggled to make videos again after that, most of the games we played involved raised voices and he couldn't bear to do anything around that. He did a lot of solo videos and after the fans knew why he was so scared, they convinced him to return to How To Minecraft. The boys were so considerate, warning him when they were going to yell and he loved it.
He had only freaked out twice during the entire almost 100 episode long series, once when Mitch unexpectedly fell into a pit of lava and had yelled out, and once when one of the Sidemen had attacked Vikk while he was streaming, scaring Vikk and in turn scaring Lachlan.
Unfortunately both events had been on live steam and were now on the internet forever but the fans had been very considerate with posting them, reporting anyone who used the clips to shame Lachlan. Many of them didn't understand the after affects of being in an abusive relationship and I think Lachlan really opened many of them up to something they had never seen.
The younger boy was still buried in the blankets and no matter what I tried, I couldn't coax him out. I could hear his almost silent whimpers every now and again, and his body was still trembling.
"Lachlan? I'm always going to be here, and I'll never hurt you. Ever. Please. You just have to trust me. " There was silence from underneath the blankets and ever so slowly, a blond head peaked out from underneath the blankets.
"Promise?" The voice was quiet and it cracked half way through the simple word. And although the word was simple, it was probably the word that meant the most to Lachlan and it always would.
"I promise. Please, I didn't mean it." His hand crept out from underneath the blanket and found its way into mine, fingers intertwining. His head moved to rest on my lap and his blue eyes closed. I kissed his forehead, curling up beside him.
Abusive people had ruined his life.
