Thorns

chapter twenty-three.

rose.

When finally making way into the room, having to shove into the door. I scan the room. A small kitchenette, a double bed, a sofa and a bathroom which had a bath, sink and toilet. I was thankful, laying Lucy onto the bed and tucking her in. I blow the thin layer of dust off of the counter, placing her bag onto it. I made my away across the creaking floor boards, seating myself onto the lumpy sofa. My face was buried within my hands, and I cried. This was my life now. Just me and Lucy. I was alone, the only person to talk to is Lucy, meaning I barely get to say much. I decide to just sleep here for the night, awkwardly laying, squeezing my eyes shut and hoping this was a nightmare, hoping Zayn didn't push me away.

I don't catch much sleep that night, nightmares lurked at the back of my mind. I am woken with the cries of Lucy, causing me to jump awake, running to see her. She tells me she thought she was alone, hugging me tightly. I fill her in on what has happened but she only cries more, telling me she wants to go "home". I leave her in bed, telling her that we should do something fun today, but she doesn't listen, crying under the covers.

"Luce, I know you're upset but you have to get over it okay. Nobody wants us and-"

"Nobody want mummy! Daddy said he love me!" Lucy screams at me. Tears prick at my eyes that my own daughter has finally snapped at me. She doesn't have any regret in her words, hiding back under the duvet. She had the right to be mad, falling asleep at an extravagant house like Louis' and waking up here. I wasn't expecting her to shout though. Shattering me from my reality. I should've moved out here alone, it would've been better.

"Luce, do you want to come with me to go shopping?" I ask, fingers shaking to grab at the duvet, pulling it back.

"No!" She cried, tears streaming.

"Okay, there's chocolate in your bag if you need. All your colouring as well, I won't be long, I love you." When she doesn't reply I wanted to cry harder, but I don't, grabbing my jacket and keys then leaving. I check three times that the door is locked before finally walking away.

I find a shop a good ten minutes away, entering whilst wiping my eyes. The place was quite big, crowds of people all around. It made me anxious on how close the motel was to actual homes, making me wonder if Carl would search here... If he looked for me that is. I grab a basket, filling it up with food and making sure I still had enough money. I scan an aisle, searching for cheap chocolate for Lucy, the thought of her made me want to just bawl.

"Rose?" I jump, looking up immediately. No, that- that Irish one was here. I begin to speed walk- speed limp?- away, hoping he would lose track, but no. He had to go grab my wrist like every other guy in that stupid boy band.

"Rose are you okay?" Nope, thanks for asking though...

"I'm fine."

"Are you sure? Why the hell are you here, we're miles away from your house!"

"Why are you here?" I ask him, hoping he wouldn't realise my intentions of changing the topic.

"I live like a two minute walk from here! I know I live far from the other boys but I like my place."

"Oh right, that's nice." Louis planned this, I swear.

"So why are you here?"

"Oh, I um moved."

"Oh? Where do you live?"

"Oh, like ten minutes away."

"Ahh right, well happy shopping!"

That went well. I take a peek at his overflowing trolley, shaking my head while making my way to the till. The fact the motel provided cups, plates, bowls and a hob made me the happiest girl alive, buying in bulk with cans. I counted my things carefully before strolling to the self service and paid it all. I then grab my bags then I was off, making my way out. On my way back, I can't help but feel the car behind me was driving extemely slow. I walk faster, hoping they would think it was someone else, but I still feel their precence, hot tears spilling over. I spin around quckly, realising my paraoia.