Amari walked into his mother's house and gave her tight hug.
"Hey son."Afeni smiled as he sat next to her. "What's going on? You looking tired."
He wasn't tired at all. He was stressed and worried. Amaru was worried about Damita and their marriage.
Amaru sighed and rubbed his hands across his face. "Man. I don't even know where to start."
"It's Damita isn't it?"Afeni sighed and grabbed her sons hand. "What's going on?"
"She lost the baby."He sighed. "Since it happened, she's been so distant. She won't even let me touch her."
"Baby? I didn't even know she was pregnant."Afeni replied with widened eyes.
"She was only 6 weeks. We didn't really get around to telling people. She didn't want to tell anybody."Amaru explained.
"Why is that?"Afeni asked.
"Because she thought this would happen. She didn't even want to keep the baby, but I convinced her. I thought everything would be okay." Amaru sighed. "I wasn't even with her when it happened. She had said that she wasn't feeling well the night before, but I didn't pay attention."
"Do you think she's blaming you?"Afeni asked.
"No, I don't think she's blaming me. She's blaming herself. I know her, she feels like she could have prevented it."Amaru replied. "She hasn't been herself. She won't touch me, she won't kiss me. When we goto sleep, she doesn't lay all over me anymore and she don't even be home. She leaves in the morning and comes back late."
"How long has it been this way?"Afeni asked.
"The day it happened, she cried in my arms all night. I just held her and let her release. She fell asleep and that was it. The next day, she was different."
Amaru took a deep sigh and rubbed his hands across his face. He really had no idea what Damita was doing or where she was going when she left the house.
Her employees wouldn't ever tell them when she was there or not. According to them she has some policy about that. No just for him, for anybody.
It was in their contract to never speak on her or her Whereabouts.
"Does she act like that with the kids too?"Afeni asked. "Amari told me that she hadn't been seeing her. She said that she just called her and told her that she loves her."
"At least she's telling somebody that she loves them. I told her that I love her and she told me to leave her alone."Amaru chuckled, but Afeni knew that he was laughing to keep from showing his true feelings about the situation.
She was his everything and when they weren't good he couldn't function. This is exactly what happened the last time. He felt like maybe he shouldn't have pressured her into keeping the baby when she had doubts.
"Now you know Damita loves you more than anything, but this is something you might not ever understand. When a woman loses a child it puts her in a different head space. She feels different about herself, even it's happened more than once. For Damita it might be worse, she has a problem and it may be harder for her to deal with this than others. Has she been taking her medicine?"Afeni explains.
"She hasn't been taking anything. Not that I know of."Amaru replied.
"Amaru..I don't know how she's been, but you are aware of Damita's mental illness right? You have to make sure she's okay and taking her meds. I don't want her to hurt herself or anybody else."Afeni sighed.
"Ma, she ain't crazy. Don't say that."Amaru replied, getting upset. "You sound just like Katherine. Nothing is wrong with my baby, don't talk about her like that."
"I'm not saying she's crazy son. She just doesn't have the same mind as everyone else and she has to take her medicine to stay calm. Baby, this is serious. You need to help her."Afeni explained, grabbing his hand.
Amaru started to get pissed off. He didn't want to hear that. He felt that she was fine and that they were going to get through this.
He knew that she had some problems, everybody does, but he knew his baby girl wasn't crazy. She just had some crazy ways, everybody does.
Amaru got up and started for the door."Ima go home and see if she there."
Before Afeni could say anything else, he was out of the door. He got into his car and drove fast to his house.
When he got there, Damita was there. She was sitting on the couch like she was waiting for him to come home.
"Hey baby."He smiled and sat down next to him.
"Hey."She replied with a weak smile.
"We, we need to talk."She added, tearfully.
Damita turned towards him so that they were face to face and grabbed his hands.
"Baby. What's wrong?"Amaru raised his hand and wiped a tear from his eyes.
Damita lowered her head and continued crying. That was all she seemed to do lately.
"You know I love you more than anything in this world right?"She sniffled.
"Of course. I love you too, but what is this about?"He was confused.
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "I don't think we should be married anymore."Her voice weakened.
Amaru tightened his grip on her hand. "Fuck You talking about Damita?"He gritted his teeth.
"You got somebody else? Huh?"He yelled grabbing her roughly. "I'll beat your fucking ass bro. Don't play with me."
She stayed quiet and he asked her again. "It's somebody else ain't it? On god, I'll kill the both of y'all. Damita you ain't fucking leaving me."He grabbed her face and looked her dead on the eyes. "I'm not playing with you. You not fucking going nowhere."
"No. You know I'd never cheat on you. I love you too much. It's just- I just- I don't think that I'm the woman for you anymore. All I do is cause pain. I can't make you happy if I'm not happy."She broke down and looked away from him.
"It's nothing to do with you. I love you so much. I don't want to hurt you anymore."Damita whimpered.
"Baby. You're not hurting me. We can fix this, you're my other half. We can't end, we can fix it."Amaru pleaded.
"Noo..we can't."Damita's voice cracked and she got up from the couch. "I don't think I can fix it this time. It's too much."She looked at him one last time before walking up the stairs.
Amaru was confused. He had no idea where this was coming from. He was doing nothing but being by her side and trying to help her get better.
They slept together one last time and when Amaru woke up the next morning he was in bed...alone.
