Today marks a week after my parents’ deaths and nothing much has changed. I moved and ate and listened like I normally do but I feel like I’m a robot, not a person. I barely spoke, I didn’t even cry. The boys have called their managers and have decided to stay here for another three weeks and they have been incredibly helpful to me. I know must be a pain to them but no matter what, they never left my side. Especially Niall. He slept beside me every night and spoke to me like nothing was wrong. He always says I love you and tries his best not to show his feelings when I don’t say it back. He takes care of me and just sits beside me quietly like he’s sharing the same thoughts as me.
Today is also my parents’ funeral. We all got into the car and drove to the venue. It was a quiet ride. No one talked, no one smiled, no one did anything but sit there and breathe. When we got to the venue, I was surprised by the amount of people that were already there. I knew my parents had a lot of friends but I only managed to invite the closest of them.
I resented the weather for being so sunny because it almost felt like it was mocking my grief and sadness. However, I followed everyone else and sat down in the front row along with the boys and Alexis. Niall wrapped his arms around me and held me close but he didn’t speak or do anything else.
When the ceremony started, I stood up along with everyone else and I just bowed my head and stared at my feet. The priest asked for the speakers to step forward and so began the long speeches from my parents’ friends about what good people they were. As I heard them talk, my eyes welled up with tears and finally, I let them go. My tears fell to the grass beneath my feet and it went in a continuous stream. Niall hugged me again and led my head to his shoulder. When the last speaker finished, I closed my eyes and sobbed. Then I tore myself away from Niall and wiped away my tears. I walked up to the microphone and cleared my throat.
“I just want to say thank you, to all of you, for coming here today and mourning my parents’ deaths. But I want to thank my parents’ too.” I breathed deeply and spoke again. “Thank you, mum and dad, for being my parents. Thank you for taking care of me and for raising me up to become what I am now. I love you both and I’ll miss seeing you. Goodbye mum and dad,” I sniffled and closed my eyes to stop the tears from falling.
When I walked back down, Niall engulfed me in his arms but this time, I continued to look forward and watch the rest of the ceremony. As they lowered both caskets, I was the first one to drop my rose in and I lowered my head. Instead of asking for a break in the clouds from God, I prayed for strength, to help me live through the pain and accept my loss.
When the ceremony finished, everyone who attended the funeral greeted me with a few kind words about my parents and some even offered to help. I smiled and replied to each of them, taking my time to appreciate their kindness towards me. As the last person left, I watched as men dig the soil back into my parents’ graves and in my head, I said my final goodbye.
I turned to the boys and Alexis and gave them a small smile. “I’m sorry I kept you waiting.”
“Don’t apologise Luc, we understand,” Liam said.
As we all walked back to the car, I felt a tug on my stomach and I felt the need to speak. “Guys, I’m sorry for being such a pain to you all these past few days. I know it hasn’t been easy for you and I’m sorry for being selfish,” I gushed out, bowing my head.
Niall stopped and hugged me. “It’s ok, Lucy. It’s hard, we all know that. Just know that we’re all here for you, all the time. Ok?”
I nodded my head and kept walking. I felt like something had been lifted off my shoulders and I looked down at the locket my parents gave me to find it shining brightly as the sun reflected on it. I smiled knowing that it was my parents’ way of telling me they were still here. I knew then that it was the reason for the bright day and I let go of the resentment I had felt towards the weather. Finally I felt at peace and I held Niall’s hand in mine. I peeked at him and he smiled at me then his eyes flickered to the locket and I knew he saw the way it shone too.
On the car on the way back, the mood was completely different from how it was this morning, things seemed lighter. I looked out my window and smiled to myself, thankful for the friends I had with me. I sent a silent thanks to my parents as well for approving of them and now I understand that, somehow, they must have known that these people in the car with me right now, are the ones that are going to stick by me through thick and thin.
Thanks mum and dad, I thought.
YOU ARE READING
ChatRoom101
FanfictionLucy was separated from her best friend, Niall, when they were seven. For her it was a very bitter experience but she vowed to find him again. However, long years had passed and soon, she had learned to move on. While in university, she met a strang...
