Torn

chapter 10

The days pass, I stay busy with work and Slash is busy partying with his band.

At work, I keep remembering his lips on mine.

At night, I lie awake, thinking about his hands touching me.

I want him.  No doubt about that. 

And I am eaten alive by guilt.  But even as i talk to Brett on the phone, my mind is always on Slash.  With that one kiss, that one small taste of that man, I am hooked.

It is Saturday night, and I worked the late shift.  As I am approaching the apartment door, I am reminded about how Brett hates me working late.  He always sits with me at the diner to make sure I am safe.  He really is a great boyfriend.  I need to focus on him.  But how?  How do I get Slash outta my mind?

I enter the apartment, and head to the kitchen.  I want a bowl of cereal and some cold juice before I head to bed.   I sit at the table with my snack, and I hear giggling from somewhere down the hall.  A female giggling.   Oh no, he has a girl over?  My heart feels heavy, and I feel my throat tighten up.  I lose my appetite, and do not even clean up the mess, I just leave he bowl on the table.

I quietly walk down the hall.  I am just about to duck into my room, when his bedroom door flings open.  I know better than to look.  But I do it anyway.

There on his bed is not one, but TWO skanky looking chicks.  They are dressed, barely, and giggling like school girls.  I feel sick.

"Oh, hey Wynn," Slash says, casually.  "I didn't hear ya come in."

"Yeah, guess your lady friends were keeping you distracted," I mumble.

"We were at a party together, they wanted to come hold my snake," he grins.

"Oh, I bet they do," I grumble as I slip inside my bedroom.

I sit there, on my bed, my heart breaking.  I have no right to be jealous, but I am.  So much that it hurts.   I keep thinking of those tramps touching him.  His lips on them, and not me.  I curl up in a ball and cry.  I ignore the phone when Brett calls.  Eventually, I turn the stereo on as loud as I can stand it, so that the music drowns out their snake holding party across the hall.

At some point I cry myself to sleep.