Torn

chapter 40

It is a quiet ride home from his mom's house.  Finally, I speak up.  "Slash, I do not want you to marry me just to make your grandma happy."

"I want to spend my life with you, though," he says.  "What would the big deal be?"

"Because it feels forced this way," I explain.

"I guess," he agrees.

A few days pass, and he has been busy working on the band's video.  I show up at the set that afternoon, after a doctor's appointment.  I watch quietly as they shoot some scenes.  When Duff sees me he comes up and gives me a big hug.

How's baby Hudson?" he asks, patting my belly.

"Playing soccer I think," I joke. "Where's Slash?"

":He left a bit ago, with Steven," he says.  He looks distracted, or maybe nervous.

"Oh," I say.  "Guess I shoulda called.  Do you know where they went?"

"Ummmm, well, the thing is..." he is definitely nervous.  "They were heading to the bar.  I think they were high."

I feel like I am gonna cry.  I thank him and leave quietly.  Slash promised me no drugs.  I am  sad and disappointed.  I head to the apartment, crying the whole time.  When I get home, I can hear Joy in her room.  The music is on and I hear voices.  Wonderful.  Just what I want, my sister to be whoring around.  I go into my room and cry. 

The time passes, and I do not hear from him.  I start to worry.  Nobody has heard from him, and he is not answering his phone.  Finally I can not stand listening to the commotion from Joy's room and I bust in there to demand peace. 

She is mostly naked, and draped across a very naked (and hairy) guy. I start raging, screaming at her and throwing things.  I call her some ugly names and tell her that her whorish behavior MUST stop.  She sits up and stares at me, a glazed look in her eyes.

"Damnit Joy! Are you fucking stoned?" I scream, on the verge of tears.

"Maybe a little," she laughs.

"It is not fucking funny!" I yell.  "I am having a baby, I can't have this shit in my home!"

"The baby's not here yet," she slurs.  The man with her stirs and that is when I recognize him.  Steven!

"Shit, Steven," I say, trying to get his attention.  "Steven! Where is Slash?"

He shrugs, laughs, then points to the corner.  Sure enough, there he sits.  Practically passed out, in a chair.  He is fully dressed, thankfully.

"Whats going on here?" I demand.

"Steve, Slash and I got some coke and got wasted.  Steve and I hooked up.  Slash just sat there, guess he watched us, I don't know." Joy explains.

I feel sick now.  I turn and leave the room.  I grab my purse and immediately leave.  Twenty minutes later I am at Lindsey's door.  I fall into her arms, a crying mess.  She tells me I can stay there.  I fall asleep on the couch, and don't even hear my phone ringing.

Author's note: Check out my friend (PewDiePie_Eminem_GnR)'s story "I Want Action".