Torn

chapter 20

I rush down the hall towards his room.  My heart is pounding, and I feel sick.   I follow closely behind Axl, who told me he has been out there with Slash for the past 2 days. 

One deep breath, then I go into the room.  There he is.  Every bit as handsome as the first moment I saw him.  His skin looks so dark against the stark white sheets.  His wild, curly hair is spread out around his head.  He looks like he is sleeping.  Peaceful.  I take three steps towards him, then my knees feel weak.  Axl supports me as Lindsey pulls over a chair.   I fall into the chair and scoot it right next to the bed.

There are several machines beeping.  One I know is monitoring Slash's heart.  Another checking his oxygen level.   One more, for blood pressure.   There is an i.v. in his left arm.  I take his right hand in my own hands.  Leaning forward, I gently kiss the palm of his hand.

"Axl, what happened?  How did he end up here? Like this?"  I ask, choking back tears.

"He was partying with a bunch of his friends," he explains.  "Had a little too much to drink, then got a bad batch of some sort of drug.  He passed out, and nobody thought anything of it.  I went there looking for him, at his buddies place,  and the minute I saw him, I knew it was bad."

"Thank you for getting him here," I say, and I mean every word.  "What are the doctors saying?"

"Basically it is up to him and his body to fight," he says.  "Wynn, he is strong."

"Let's give her a few minutes with him," Lindsey says, taking Axl's hand.  They leave together, and shut the door as they go.

"Oh, Slash," I practically whimper.  I reach over and run my fingers through his hair, then stroke his cheek.  "I fucked up.  Choosing Brett when my heart belonged to you.  Fight this, please, Slash.  Come back and give me a chance to love you."

I lay my head down on the bed, still clutching his hand.  I hope and pray that he will be ok.  As I sit there with him, I think back over the last few months.  He has been so sweet, and so funny.  He makes me smile, he makes me laugh. 

I look at his face.  So peaceful, so perfect.  I know this man, his spirit and his personality.

I know without a doubt that I love him.  And always will.