Torn

chapter 11

I wake up hours later, my head throbbing.  I lay in the dark, listening for any signs of life in the apartment.  It seems quiet, so I creep out of my room and out to the kitchen.  I am at the counter, with a glass of water and some aspirin when I hear movement.  I stand perfectly still, my eyes closed. 

"You sure we should not wake him up?" a female voice whispers.

"No, let him sleep," another replies.  "He needs his sleep."

"I guess," the first voice agrees.  "Seems rude, though."

"He will get over it,"  female number two says.  "I really wanted to spend more time with him.  He is so hot."

"Yeah," her friend agrees.  "Shame he is hung up on that chick, we cuold have had quite the party."

They reach the door and let themselves out.  I stand there, trying to process what I overheard.  I rush off to my room, to avoid bumping into Slash.

I fall asleep again, and awake to my phone ringing.  I grab it and mumble a hello.

"Hey beautiful," Brett says.  "I am coming for a visit,  I should be there in about an hour."

"I just woke up," I say.  I should be excited to see him.  But the excitement is just not there.  "See ya in an hour then."

I hang up and go to the bathroom to shower.  I put little effort into getting dressed and making myself presentable.   When I go out to the kitchen, Slash is sitting there, his head in his hands.  I don't speak, I just make some coffee.  I pour two cups, and sit one in front of him. 

"You hate me?" he asks.

"No, why would I?"  I am confused.

"I am an ass," he says.  "And  I am fucking sorry."

Just then, the door opens, and Brett rushes in.  He swoops me up into a big hug, spinning me around.  My eyes meet Slash's and I feel such intensity in his stare.

Slash picks up his cup and goes to his room.  My eyes follow him as he goes.  I long to follow him.  But Brett is here, and I need to deal with him. 

We sit down and talk about his job and what he has been doing.  I can not really tell him much about what I have been doing while he was away.  Its not like I can tell him I am hot for his friend. 

As we are talking, Brett tells me that he will be staying out of town for longer than expected.  I should be disappointed, but I am not.  I feel so guilty.  I need to either be his, or break this off.  I am so confused, so torn about what to do.

After I work my shift, and we eat dinner, we head to bed.  Brett is leaving in the morning.  He tries to kiss me and get me in the mood, but when he slips out of bed to get me a glass of water (at my request) I pretend to be asleep.  He takes his phone out and spends the next hour texting someone.

In the morning, he kisses my cheek before he leaves, no words are spoken.

I should go after him.  I should tell him I love him and want to go with him.  Instead, I wait until he leaves and I go knock on Slash's door.