DEH Oneshots/drabbles/shitposts

Choices (Kleinsen)

The simplicity in a five letter word can sometimes leave one hanging. Exhaustion can come from many of those five letter words being strung together into a boring article that often gets overlooked and only glanced at when children are answering questions about it on standardized tests.

But this word;

This stupid, anger invoking, heartbreaking, soul-crushing, five letter word was the word—the emotion that took Jared Kleinman's best friend; his only friend, away from him.

That no good, five letter word was Wrath.

wrath
raTH
noun
extreme anger (chiefly used for humorous or rhetorical effect).

The effect that Jared had displayed was nowhere near humorous or rhetorical. It was pure, seething anger at his best friend for being such a selfish prick.

"Go on, then! Do it! Tell everybody that you helped write letters pretending to be a kid who killed himself!"

"Fuck you, Evan! Asshole!"

Jared could see the pain in his friend's eyes as he screamed that. He could see that he'd gone too far, yet he still didn't apologize to the boy that he knew would need it. He fucking knew Evan would hate himself for pissing Jared off. He knew he would feel bad for getting the boy to raise his voice at him.

Yet he still didn't apologize.

Why didn't he apologize?

It had been weeks since Evan had spoken to him. The boy had come clean to the Murphy's and to his mother. You could imagine how they took it. There were tears, and fights, and panic attacks, and stupid Jared let himself believe Evan would be fine.

Evan wasn't. He hadn't spoken to Jared, because Jared never listened. His mother tried so hard to make everything right with her son, but it was no use, because Evan could always feel the nervousness in the air; the hesitation in her voice. It was enough to slither through her teeth and wrap around his neck like a boa constrictor cutting off all of his rational thinking. It hurt to be stuck in a position where no one trusted him. It physically pained him to get out of bed in the morning when he knew what awaited him was levels upon levels of hate and anger, because despite all her family's efforts, Zoe Murphy let it slip that it was all a lie.

News about Evan's painful, painful lie spread like wildfire.

He would never be seen as anything but a self-entitled, arrogant nerd who put a family—a grieving family through hell just to try a different life on for size.

Evan didn't know until now, that even invisible was better than that.

Because of Evan's stupid greed, Evan was stuck being even more alone than he was before he ever knew the name Connor Murphy.

His greed killed all of his hope for a better life.

greed
ɡrēd
noun
intense and selfish desire for something, especially wealth, power, or food.

Thanks to his greed, his best friend doesn't even want to talk to him anymore.

Thanks to his greed, Evan found the only way out.

—

It was three o' clock, Give or take a few minutes, when Jared got the frantic phone call from Heidi Hansen that she had come home from her shift early, to find her son dying in the kitchen.

She never explained to Jared how Evan tried to do it. She never got that far, because Jared hung up the phone after she said the first sentence. He was up like a firecracker, slipping in his stupid adidas slides and a t-shirt before scrambling out of his home and down the road in nothing but boxers, and a shirt.

He sprinted into the house to see a terrified mother, staring as her dying son was taken away.

"He didn't tell me," Heidi sobbed. "He didn't say anything and now... oh my god I'm gonna lose him."

But the only thing Jared could think when he got there; when he saw him, was three words.

It's my fault.

It was an ear worm, his brain seemingly unable to get it out of his head, and it rocked him so badly that he couldn't stand up straight. He fell backwards into the door, almost letting out a help of pain as he slid down the wall and to the floor. "Oh my god," He squeaked. "No, wait, Evan!"

It was excruciating.

Knowing someone was dying at your hand; it was your fault because of your stupid, mindless, emotion driven words. That pain was far worse than any other pain Jared had felt in his entire life.

He pulled on his hair, shoving his head between his knees.

Evan was being carried out on a gurney because of what he said.

What he fucking said.

Please, please no, I can't... I can't lose him. He's all I have left.

"Jared, calm down." It was the voice of Heidi Hansen, still slightly panicked, but softer, more caring. She crouched next to him, pulling him into a tight hug. It felt right for the both of them in that moment, to stay there, to hide from the world.

A mother losing her son.

A boy losing his best friend.

It ruined their lives in a split second. A split second of regret was all it took for Evan to make the decisions he did. A split second was all it took for Jared to scream at his best friend. A split second was all it took for Heidi make the decision not to do more to help her son.

And that split second led to the death of her son.

It never really mattered, after that. Heidi and Jared grew closer, Jared practically growing away from his family because Heidi needed him so badly. They never moved on. Jared became the son she always needed, but he wasn't the son he always wanted to be.

Because the son he always wanted to be was buried four miles down the road at a local cemetery that neither of them wanted to remember.

Jared's wrath was what killed Evan.

But Evan's greed was what gave it the power to do so.