The Secret Between Us [BxB]

8. Damn You Tiny Demons

"MATTY, YOUR LEFT FOOT, FIX IT NOW!" 

I get yelled at by our choreographer as I quickly fix myself back into position. My mind had been focused on other things since my morning with Wesley.

Sometimes, I really hated Wesley Anderson. I'm a polyamourous hypersexual fuckboy who never focuses on one guy. Guys, Girls, I loved them all but everything came to a crashing halt the moment I set my target for Wesley. 

I hate the way he has me so wound up without trying.
I hate the way he invades my thoughts without a sound.
I hate the way I nearly kill myself to be in his line of sight sometimes. 

I also hate the fact he's ten years older than me. 

I take out my powerful aggression as I correctly dance to the beat this time around. Next month was our real debut on the Coachella stage and we were pushing ourselves to the limit to make sure everything was perfect. 

Because we couldn't fuck this up, and as our name states, there was no turning back. 

After 12 hours of practice, which included singing lessons, dancing, and then singing while dancing, I came back to my room feeling defeated. Practice was so awful that I was kicking myself with frustration for fucking up so many times and letting the team down. 

I hop in the shower, slowly banging my head against the tile wall and letting out a long depressing sigh. Even though our band's practice was a daily occurrence, my body was still so sore and I'm pretty sure that carrying a little freeloader around just for the ride was doing horrible things to my spinal alignment. 

I run my fingers through my thick mop of wet hair and close my eyes so I don't get soap in them, scrubbing in the conditioner and letting it set so I could wash my body. The hot water felt so good against my tight muscles as I run my bar of soap over my biceps before running it over my pecks. 

"Fuck, they're so sensitive," I wince after going over my nipples without thinking twice and instantly regretting it. I paused to let the burn settle before daring to look down at what I had going on. 

Although my nipples felt like I had tiny demons poking them with their stupid spears, there wasn't much in terms of growth. A little swelling sure, but I was still practically flat chested which was disappointing. 

Not that I wanted to suddenly sprout huge boobs or anything, but I really wanted to try to chest feed my baby because I read up on all the health benefits she would have if I did. I still had six months left to go so I guess I still have time to grow. 

"Hey you," I giggled as I traced the line down my stomach where I imagine her quietly doing her thing, probably swimming around a bit in her little home inside me. Apparently, my baby girl is now the size of a lemon according to my baby monitor, Thomas Jackson. 

I hold the soap on my stomach, the bump was still small enough to easily hide but you could clearly see her growing now. 

"I wonder if you're going to look more like me or your daddy. Not that I've seen the man as a baby, but I figure while you're building yourself in there, I should let you know that if you choose to look more like him, I'm going to take that as the highest form of betrayal," I tell her and continue my hot shower, rinsing the conditioner from my scalp.

"Not that your daddy's ugly or anything. Actually, he's probably the most gorgeous man in the world if you ask me, but don't tell him I said that. His head is big enough as it is," I tease her but I quickly realize what I just said and feel the sadness creeping in to spoil my lighthearted mood. 

"Not like he's going to know you're his anyway," I protectively wrap my arms around my stomach in a small moment of weakness. Thankful for the shower to wipe away my tears. 

"We don't need him baby. It's going to be just you and me. I can give you all the love you need," I reassure myself more than the little lemon-sized nugget. I think I'm actually going to be the first single father in my entire family. 

"Right baby girl?" I close my eyes, taking in the steam when a knock on the bathroom door startles me.

"Matty?! You okay?" I hear Thomas call out and I turn off the shower, confused as to why so many people think they can just walk into my bedroom. 

I wait for a moment and just listen with the only sound coming from the water dripping off the shower head and onto the tile floor. 

Just as I had suspected there were no fire alarms, no ambulance sounds, no screaming.
Which means...no ones dying. 

Which means...NO ONE SHOULD BE IN MY ROOM. 

"Yeah, I'll be out in a second," I grumble back, grabbing my towel and drying myself off.