Family Ties | JJK

23: Healing TaeTae

**

The late hour had you yawning and struggling to keep your eyes open, one by one the members had left to go to their rooms until just Tae was left.

'You're fighting to stay awake, why don't you go to bed?' He asks you.

'I'm not tired,' Tae raises a single eye brow slightly, looking like he doesn't believe you. Your body decides to betray you at that moment as you fail to stifle another yawn. Giving up you explain.

'I'm scared to sleep.'

'Why?'

'I've been getting nightmares, Yoongi walked in on one today and helped me, but now I'm scared... I don't want to go to sleep, just to wake up again dripping in sweat, trembling in fear, still seeing the images of whatever memory decided to haunt me... I hate it.'

'You need to sleep, Y/N. Can I help?' Tae asks, and you can tell just from who he is that he would do anything in a heartbeat to help you.

'I'm not sure anyone can, I have to go to sleep eventually, but I've seen too much to not be haunted by memories.' You sigh and rub your burning eyes, you really were tired, tired of it all.

Because after a wonderful day you were back here.

It seemed no matter how much the boys supported you, your demons stayed.

'We're all here for you, I hope you know that,' he smiles and hugs a pillow to his chest, 'I think one of the best things in life is a cuddle, didn't you know- Hugs can heal anything.'

You smile at his rare look on things. You know what he is asking you and standing up you walk over and give him a quick hug.

'Thanks Tae, but I think my scars are too deep to ever heal.'

He smiles softly, care emanating from his body next to yours, 'Of course, but everything heals eventually, I promise, don't forget that, you will heal.'

You smile and rest your head on his shoulder for a second, calmed if only for a moment, your worries are forgotten.

'Want hot cocoa before bed?'

'Yes,' you practically melt at the thought of a hot chocolate right now. 'You're the best.'

Laughing he ruffles your hair, 'Don't let Jungkook hear you, that boy is too competitive.'

You smile and blush at the implication of his words.

Together, sipping your drinks late at night, you and Tae watch the moon shine as you try to keep the edging fear at bay. You can tell he senses it beside you, and he murmurs soft words for as long as you need it. Eventually, you place your finished drink down and say goodnight to Tae.

Walking towards your room you remind yourself of what he said, everything heals eventually, you guess you just have a lot more healing than most.

But you will heal.

You promise yourself.

**

In your room you change quickly into your warmest pyjamas, wrapping yourself up tightly. Laying down in your corner, you burrow under the blankets and tuck yourself in up to your nose. The dark seems to press onto your chest. The moonlight doesn't seem to shine as bright now. Your breath quickens and your chest rises against the oppressive dark choking you, pushing out stuttering breaths.

Thinking about what Tae said, right now you know you can't take another nightmare.

Jumping out of the covers, you run the short distance out of your room and slip past the next door.

Diving not so gently onto the bed you throw yourself under the heavy blanket and panting slightly you turn your head to the side.

Jungkook wakes quickly but gently, blinking his eyes cutely.

Turning your body next to him in the darkness you sense his calm presence, and you wish you were brave enough to reach out and just wrap yourself up in his safe arms, but you weren't.

You notice with a groan he is shirtless, again. Does this boy never sleep in clothes? At least his leg next to you reassures you he does, in fact, have joggers on.

'Y/N, you're in my bed right now?' His voice, barely a whisper, rumbles deep enough to make your breath catch. However your desire from Jungkook's sensual voice was only a small feeling compared to the realisation that you had, in your desperation to be in his arms, came straight into his bed.

Now your breathing quickens and you begin to panic, tears pool behind your lashes and your fingers tremble.

The beginnings of a panic attack rise... And rise... And rise... And stop.

Opening your eyes you see your cold hands encompassed by Jungkook's. His warmth and presence grounding you.

'Y/N breathe, relax, I'm here, your safe with me.' His words, so soft, hold such emotion. You draw closer to him.

'If you need to go, to get out of this bed,' he gulps and looks at you full of a heart-breaking hope that you won't take his offer, 'then you can.'

But amazingly your first instinct isn't to run, isn't to hide... It isn't to go.

In fact, all you want to do is move closer to Jungkook, to wrap yourself up in his arms.

Was it scary, laying in his bed? God yes. In the background, your pulse was beating and your nerves were pulled taut.

But before all of that, was your desire. And with Jungkook, all the other emotions seemed small in comparison- He made you feel safe.

'I won't.' Two words and Jungkook seems to release a world of tension and fear, he pulls you closer and you rest against his chest.

'What happened?' He asks you.

'Couldn't sleep,' you reply quietly. Jungkook doesn't speak. Sighing you know he's waiting for more.

Glad he can't see your face against his chest you mumble out a quick, 'worried about you.'

'What?' He breathes, startled. Holding you closer, arm wrapped around your waist the touch surprises you as he gently asks, 'why?' Waiting for you to give an answer you're not sure how to even begin.

'I didn't want to go to sleep, but Tae helped me to be brave, the only problem is, in my sleep I can't be brave.'

Jungkook looks worried and confused, 'I don't understand,' he looks almost hurt at your words and you stammer.

'Nightmares, every night, always the same, the night my mom died, mainly Kang Sun, but recently though...'

'Recently what?'

'Recently you.'

Jungkook's arms spasm around you at your answer. 'What about me? I'm in your dreams?'

'No, my nightmares,' you don't want to go into detail, he should understand now.

'Oh,' he seems to understand, a crease between his dark brows.

Smiling you reach out hesitantly with a finger and smooth at the crease from his frown.

'Don't worry about me.'

'Y/N,' he said, catching your hand with his as you went to pull away, 'I will always worry about you.' Leaning forward he presses a butterfly light kiss against your cold hand.

A small puff of air leaves your parted lips and tickles his nose. You don't know what to say, but you don't have to when Jungkook continues. 'How can I help?'

You go to say he doesn't need to, the old you would have shied away from opening up to him. But you think of today, and how both Tae and Yoongi had made you feel safe

'I feel safe when I'm with you, maybe... Just for tonight...' God, you couldn't believe you were asking this, 'Could I stay here?' You look at him.

He breaths out slowly and moves closer, if possible.

'Of course, stay with me.'

Without hesitation you draw into each other's arms.

**