Family Ties | JJK

38: Jungkook's Fight

**

The night is frigid with icy winds, but you are so far past numbness that you do not notice the frost, biting your sore nose, or the strong winds chafing your lips. You don't feel anything, not the cold, not the way your tears freeze against your cheeks in seconds before they even have a chance to run off your cheeks, not even the aching hole in your chest where memories of Jungkook cannot ease the emptiness there.

The salty tang of your tears seep into your wounded face and not even the sting of the burn against the sore skin awakens you.

You're numb, barely breathing, hardly thinking and completely... Completely broken.

You keep going, head dipped down, you have to move and not stop.

Throwing open the outer gates of the apartment you leave. Footsteps behind you echo through the night, causing you to wince in realisation.

You had just broken your own heart, and you couldn't take much more. You wanted to be in Jungkook's arms... But you wanted him to be safe more.

'Y/N stop! Wait... Please, please...' His voice shouts pathetically from behind you, sounding as awful as you felt and you knew that if you opened your mouth your words would be just as shattered.

So you don't look back.

Jungkook doesn't stop. He can't let you go. He's crying at you to just wait and you're crying uncontrollably now.

'Stop!'

He catches up to you and pulls at your body, drawing you back into his chest. For a moment you think to pull away, to wrench your body from his grasp and run.

But you're exhausted and hurt, so hurt.

Hugging you from behind he rests his chin on your shoulder and his breath tickles your ear. You fall into his embrace completely and his warmth begins to thaw the icy grip around your lungs.

You breathe shakily- A shuddering inhale of the crisp night air. Behind you, Jungkook grip tightens.

'Y/N, don't lie to me.'

You don't need to see his face to know if he is angry or not. His words hold an abyss of anger and disappointment and pain, and you know why. His mouth, a breath away from your ear, drips with heavy emotion, the kind that cloys on your tongue and stops you breathing.

The emotion that physically hurts you, you can feel it, right there inside you. The pain and the grief and the sadness.

You feel sick to your stomach knowing you did this, it was you. Your fault. You hurt Jungkook.

But you needed to remember why... Why you had to leave.

But Jungkook wasn't letting you, carrying on slowly, 'Your words, you can't imagine how much it hurt to hear, but I refuse to believe them. You're running away, again.. Y/N I thought you were brave? Won't you fight, for this? Us?'

You had been running your whole life, always moving, always surrounded by danger, you had learnt how to survive. But this time, Jungkook was wrong, you weren't running like always, you were running away to protect him, and the boys.

'Stay with me?'

His words stir something in your chest. You feel your pulse quicken and your face heat up, his body still pressed against yours.

'Jungkook,' Your voice cracks slightly, 'I'm tired of hiding my heart, of being scared. Yes, you're what I want. But I can't... I can't okay! This pain? It's tearing me apart.'