It's all about Black (10 mates) - Finished

Chapter 39: After the storm

Chapter 39: After the storm

There was a knock on the door but I just couldn't think straight. Justin was about to talk when I sat up and looked at the door with teary eyes "Go away" my voice was so muffled and rough from all the crying. I collapsed back onto the bed and cried again.

"Princess" Zeth begged through the door, Justin reached out to touch me but I moved away and cried even harder "leave me alone" I yelled into the pillow. My eyes were so tired from all the crying and my voice was broken and everything was just unpleasant.

"Mi-" I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned pissed as ever looking at Justin "LEAVE!" I screamed at him as his hand made contact with my shoulder.

He let his hand drop and then looked at me pleadingly, he was about to say something but I beat him to it, "please just let me be, I need Tristan!" I begged him but even though I was crying and showed my mates off and begged them to set him free I just knew that things wouldn't change back easily.

Justin got up "just call for us if you need anything, even a hug or just our presence" he said, I did not dare to look up, I was so out of balance with everything. I didn't even know if it was Tristan being caught that made me cry.

I was, of course, upset that he is in the dungeon, but even if that didn't happen I think I would still have this moment I was having right here on a bed, letting all of my tears spill as I screamed at the world to stop.

Homesickness, loss of the grandma I've never met, the way Asgar and I broke apart, Mimi not in my life, emptiness, loneliness, Rochelle, Maxi, necklace, 10 mates, werewolf, I ruined their family – everything came up this instant!

My brain was so stressed, always smile and always joke. Keep it inside and do not show. It showed!

Weird things like why did I have to wear jeans the day I got my period the first time and made a fool out of myself, why did I never have any real friends, why were they talking about me in the hallways, why did I ask my neighbor if she was pregnant. I was, or am a bad person, I am not good, I am so not good! I ruin everything for everyone!

I am 17, I have never cooked for myself, or cleaned my room, or done my laundry myself. When I smile I show too much teeth, I easily sweat and then my hair looks like a puddle. Why am I ugly, why does no one like me, why can't I be like everybody else...

Why didn't mom and dad want me, why did they work so much and why did they let Mimi take me. Was I a mistake?

As the tears felt I felt relieved, like every droplet that fell from my eye held a bad memory and every time it disappeared light came in giving me a pint of joy in life.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and when I felt the comforting shocks I got up and hugged tightly the chest of my mate. Mike held onto me and kept me close against his warm body. "Shh, everything will be alright baby girl" he shushed me in a comforting voice and stroked my hair.

I hid my face in his shirt crying even harder at his words, "Tristan" was the only thing I could manage to say. "I'm so sorry princess" a familiar voice spoke, I looked shocked at the door and saw Tristan standing there.

I jumped out of Zeth's arms and jumped into Tristan's. Tristan gave me a sorrowful look and that's when I realized that this wasn't him. This was Nathan... I cried even harder on his shoulder and buried my face in the skin between neck and shoulder.

*

I lay in bed, I couldn't cry anymore, hours went by and the boys watched me like a hawk. Nothing I did went unnoticed. I lay on my side and tried to get the puzzle done.