The Middle - Volume Three ✔️

Chapter 45 (Patrick)

Patrick

“So he just wanted to end it, just like that?” I ask Amanda.

“Yeah, I mean, it made sense. But it still hurt, you know? He’s only a couple hours away, we could have at least tried.”

“Yeah, Joel and Jay are both dating girls who live in New York. It can work if you make it work, I guess.”

“Exactly.” She twirls her straw around in her vodka cranberry.

I’m on my fourth Jack and Coke, and Amanda moved on to vodka cranberries after she had a cider. She’s listened to me go on and on about Jamie, and I’ve listened to her complain about her ex. They broke up when they both went off to different colleges. I can tell she’s not completely over him.

“You’re gonna find someone else. Trust me.” I smile at her, she looks so bummed.

“Yeah, well, I almost thought I had.” She gestures her hand at me and laughs. “But I’ll stay positive. I will find the right guy. And you’re gonna find the right girl.”

She smiles at me, but I can’t smile back at her. I can’t see past Jamie, not tonight at least. Probably not for a long time. I have a long fucking road ahead of me.

“I spend so much time around Jamie, though.” I explain, sighing heavily. “I can’t get over her when I’m always around her. It's gonna be tough."

“Hmm.” She sips her drink. “Well, how about taking a break from the band?”

“No, I can’t do that. Jay and Joel would be pissed.” I shake my head. That’s not an option.

“Would they, though?” She asks. “From what you’ve told me, Jay and Jamie write most of the music themselves anyway. You just bring the beat in afterwards. So, you could take some time away from it, and add the drum stuff in later on.”

She has a point, but still, that’s not an option. It's not just about writing music. “No, we perform and mess around together all the time. It wouldn’t work.”

“I don’t see why not. They can play acoustic sets for a few weeks.” She shrugs her shoulders. “You're in a fortunate position being the drummer. They don’t always need you.”

“Hey.” I flick some of my drink at her. “No need to hurt my feelings.”

“Well, it’s true.” She flicks some of her drink right back at me. “You wouldn’t be a huge loss for a little while. I mean, what would they do if you went on a month long vacation or something?”

“I wish I could do that.” I run a hand through my hair and sigh.

“I think you should take a break. You said yourself, you guys have already been scouted but you don’t wanna accept any offers right now. So what do you need to devote so much time to the band for? The timing couldn’t be better.” She smiles at me.

It’s worth thinking about, I guess. Joel would understand, because he would know the real reason why I wanna get away from The Middle for a bit. Same goes for Jamie, and let’s face it, she’d probably be happy getting a break from me for a while too. She’ll be in her honeymoon phase with Noah. I really don’t wanna be around for that.

But what about Jay? What the hell would I tell him? There’s no way he would understand this. He’d be fucking furious. I can’t even try to act casual about it by saying I’m tired of playing all the time, because that would be a total lie, and he would worry. Fuck knows, I’ll think on it though. Time away from the band (Jamie) would be good.

“Right, I’m gonna head home.” Amanda announces, getting up from her chair.

“I'll walk you.” I say, downing the last of my drink and getting up too.

“Thanks,” She smiles at me and we head for the main exit.

When we get outside, it is fucking freezing. I pull the zipper of my hoodie up and throw my beanie on. January weather, you know. And Amanda is only wearing a light denim jacket over her sheer black top.

“Jesus, it’s cold. How late is it?” She asks me, rubbing her arms for warmth.

“It’s almost 11.” I tell her. We kinda lost track of time, what with all the talking we were doing.

“Fuck, okay, let’s go.” She starts walking down the street, but I grab her arm to stop her.

“Hang on.” I unzip my hoodie and shrug out of it. Yes, it is fucking freezing. But she’s been so nice to me tonight, it’s the least I can do. I hand her my hoodie “Here.”

“Are you sure?” She asks, but she takes it from me immediately and puts it on, making me laughing.

“Yeah, I’m trying this new thing now. Being a gentleman, I think they call it.”

She laughs at me. “Thanks, I’ll give it back when we get to my dorm.”

And with that, we head down the street towards her dorm. My hands are pretty much frozen into my front pockets, I’m so cold. But it’s fine, her dorm isn’t far away.