The Middle - Volume Three ✔️

Chapter 48

Jamie

It’s been one week since Patrick told us he’s gotten a volunteer job at the youth centre.

Seven days since Patrick told us that everything’s fine, he just wants to teach kids how to play the drums.

168 hours since Patrick told us not to worry, that everything would go back to normal in a few months.

And it’s been the worst week of my adult life so far.

Day 1, Monday. I woke up, got ready for school, and went to school. I sat through all my classes, took notes and ate lunch with Aubrey, Kim, John and Zach. I did everything a normal college student does. But my heart wasn’t in it, and I walked around Campus like a zombie. I didn’t even drink any coffee on Monday. None. At all. Which is so not like me. I just didn’t care. I knew Aubrey and Kim thought I was acting weird because of Noah, which is fine. They didn’t ask me about him, and they tried to keep all conversation light. I got through it.

Monday night was weird. I got home from school, walked Benji, and made myself some dinner (if Cornflakes count as dinner) then sat down in front of the TV. By the time I went to bed, I felt completely devoid of all emotion. No one came by unannounced, no one was in my garage playing music when I got home, and no one was in my kitchen eating my food or drinking my shitty instant coffee. I was totally alone. Which set the tone for the days that followed.

Day 2, Tuesday. I woke up to a huge text from Joel, which went something like this: Hey, Jame, sorry I didn’t come by last night, I did mean to but I ended up wasting my entire night trying to convince Jay not to fuck off back to New York and miss school. He didn’t listen to me, of course, and off he went. Patrick hasn’t been back to the apartment, either. He told me he’s staying at Lola’s because he wants to give me time to cool off or some shit. Whatever, who cares, I’ll come by tonight.
My words, not Joel’s, obviously. But that’s the gist of his message.

I went to school, ate lunch, talked to my friends a little, and then I went home. I walked Benji, ate dinner (Cornflakes again), did some cleaning and laundry, then I sat in front of the TV and awaited Joel’s arrival. But this time, when I was sitting staring at whatever was on TV, I got a call from Erin. She was worried about Jay, and she asked me what happened, so I told her. My version of the story was exactly the same as Jay’s of course, which didn’t really satisfy Erin’s curiosity, but I don’t care. She told me that she managed to calm Jay down a little when he got to her dorm, and she’s working on convincing him to come back to North Bridge soon so that he won’t miss anymore classes. After I hung up the phone, I got a text from Jay, which said something along the lines of: I’ll be back for classes next week. I’m pissed, Jame. You must be too? If I saw his face this week I’d probably punch him. See you next week, J x. And I replied with something along the lines of: Yeah, see you then.

Then Joel came over, which was a particularly low point in my week. I feel for him, I really do. This situation we’re in is exactly what he’s been trying to prevent for the past few years, ever since Patrick bought me those Ed Sheeran tickets and Joel figured it all out. He was stressed because he hadn’t seen Patrick since Sunday, and because Jay went back to New York, and because as much as he’s tried talking to Sarah about all of this, she just doesn’t really get it. I understand that, not even Erin gets it. No one outside of the four of us understands our dynamic. We’re The Middle, we love each other, we see each other almost every day, we don’t get sick of each other, and we don’t take time out or spend time apart. Joel swore he hasn’t told Sarah the real reason for Patrick’s sudden departure. He says he’s never told anyone, and that’s not about to change now.

I hung out with Joel most of the night, and it sucked. He was so upset about the whole thing, and he didn’t wanna talk about anything else. He kept going on and on about it, and every time he said Patrick’s name I felt a sharp pain in my chest. But I’m partly to blame for this. So if Joel needs to rant about it, I’ll sit there and let him. It’s effecting all of us, not just me.