Hermitcraft Prank War: The Stageplay

The Prank War: Scene 8

Impulse: Yeah, but the snow golems are basically wearing a helmet. So that means-

Tango: Carved pumpkins don't count as a helmet! If Zedaph were to get a pair of shears-

Impulse: Zed, unarmored, can obviously defeat 1000 snow golems in theory. Anyone can. But would he have the heart to?

Tango: You bring a good point. I'm pretty sure he could get through about 20 before feeling guilty. He'll try to hide it but will eventually cave in. 

Impulse: If all the snow golems don't have their pumpkins on, I'm pretty sure their goofy faces will stop Zed from killing more than 10.

Tango: How many shears is that? Shearing 1000 pumpkins is a lot.

Impulse: You're speaking as if we're actually gonna pin Zed against 1000 snow golems.

Tango: Nah, that'll be way too much work... unless?

(Grian enters with sack)

Tango: Hey Grian!

Impulse: Hey G!

Grian: Hello, Impulse...

Tango: Sorry, Impulse, me and Grian kinda have a meeting right now.

Impulse: Okay. Bye, Tango!

Tango: Bye!

Grian: Oh! And also, I advise you not to go to your base for a while.

Impulse: Alright! I was gonna work on another farm, anyway.

(Impulse exits)

Grian: Wow, that was easy. So, Tango, you're probably wondering why I've brought you to the stock exchange. There's sort of been a cascade of events that happened on the server. The False poop incident happened. Then False got me and her to prank Ren, but it turns out that Ren didn't actually do it. So Ren pranked me in return. And they gave me a book that said to go to this weird ghost ship beside Cleo's ship and it killed me. Yep, I was killed by two zombies in a hole with Ren and Doc's face on them just to take the mick. And now, I'm retaliating against them. I'm getting them where it hurts the most, the stock exchange. So, I need your help to get in. But before we go in, we have to disguise ourselves. (takes out Mumbo's tuxedo, False's clothes, and a yellow wig) I'm going to be disguised as Mumbo Jumbo, and you're going to be disguised as Falsesymmetry. I tailored these myself.

(They put on their disguises)

Tango: Does this look-

Grian: You gotta do the voice, man! We only have 1 shot at this. We can't mess this up.

Tango: Of course. (in high pitched British accent) Hi guys! I'm Falsesymmetry! I'm really good at PvP and golly gee I sure do love England. Definitely not Tango!

(Tango remains in this voice for the rest of the scene)

Grian: Perfect! You can't tell the difference. Let's go.

(They enter the stock exchange)

Grian: Y'know, I've never mentioned how well the stock exchange looks. Its interior feels so cozy, yet so professional. I love it!

Tango: We're not gonna do anything that messes it up, right?

Grian: Of course not! In fact, we're gonna make it better.

Tango: What's in the sack?

Grian: It's a surprise tool that'll help us later. Enough chit-chat! There are two pillars. We have to rotate the heads at exactly the same time, 7 times. That's when I need you. And also because I don't wanna break it.